Whats the first thing you do when your grandmother gets hit by a toaster? Buy a new toaster.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm Scizophrenic And so am I.

What's the difference between a duck? A toothbrush, because a car only has four doors!

Got in a Taxi and the driver said "You'll never guess who i had in the back of my cab the other day". I said "It's probably pointless me trying to guess then ".

why did jimmy win the lottery? WAFFLE

Bitch please, you're adopted as well.

women's rights

Why did the fat guy smell bad? He just farted diarrhea.

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It died. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first koala. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? Peer Pressure.

Knock Knock Whose there? I have a gun and candy, get in the van

whats fat and sits on a toilet? a fat guy sitting on the toilet

Chuck Norris walks into a bar, and asks for directions to the nearest Applebee's.

Why was the boy upset? His penis fell off and his mom was making him go to the library.

Why did the trombone player have sex so often? Because he was hot.

Why didn't grandma ever return Johnathon's calls? Grandma was brutally murdered 2 years prior. Johnathon had issues believing that she was gone. He went on to live a life of pain and suffering, which would eventually lead to suicide at the age of 24.

How do you get a clown off a swing? Hit him with an ax.

I like my women how I like my coffee; without a penis.

You know what they say... Once you go black you...have gone down the road of diversity and it's impossible to back track and return to ones previous misconceptions.

Why did the doctor commit suicide? His wife was recently killed in a car accident and simply could not take the emotional pain!

What do you call a fish with no eyes? Blind.

Why was the woman riding a camel? Because woman aren't allowed to drive in her country therefore she rides a camel as a way to commute. The camel's name is Gregory.

Q: Why did the Japanese man fall off the cliff? A: He was pushed

"Knock Knock" "Who's there" "BOO" "BOO WHO" "No it's just BOO"

A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 30 years later he would gamble away his family's life savings and then go onto live a long and unfulfilled life.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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