Where does Charlie Sheen Shop? Winners

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Wanna hear a clean joke? I took a bath with bubbles. Wanna hear a dirty joke? Bubbles is the girl next door.

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Why did Suzy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Suzy.

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roses are red violets are blue tis poem makes no sense so screw you

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whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting stranded on an island with your best friend and realizing several days later that you will have to eat him to survive. hours after eating your friend a boat saves you and now have to live the rest of your life knowing you ate somebody.................... oh and the Holocaust

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What do you call something that lives in a pineapple under the sea? I don't know, but that seems like an improbable circumstance.

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why did the chicken cross the road? I dunno ask the chicken

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Q)Why doesn't the blond have a job? A) he is 12

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Where's the dick??? east

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When is a door not a door? When your burns down.

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What did Batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile? "Robin, get in the batmobile!"

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whats white and looks like paper paper

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What happens if you play CS:GO? Well you loose alot of fucking money.

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Why did Steve put his trumpet in the fridge? He had begun the early stages of dementia and was becoming increasingly confused and detached from reality. Also he was German.

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Question: Whats worse then getting hit by a bus? Answer: Getting hit by a train.

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Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M's factory? For throwing away all the W's

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sex with dead people. they can't say no;)

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Why did susie fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms... Why didn't she get up? She didn't have any legs... Why didn't anyone help her? She didn't have any friends. Then she died

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Q: What do people usually find funny? A: A joke.

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A man is walking down the street and sees a women sat on the pavement crying, he walks over to her and asks "what's wrong?" to which the women replies "it doesn't matter" the women then walks away as she did not want to share private information with a stranger.

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whats it called when a pimp slaps a ho? RESPECT

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Waiter, waiter! There is a fly in my soup. Sorry about that sir, we will replace your order and make your meal complementary.

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roses are blue violets are red... i have to use the bathroom

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Whats the first thing you do when your grandmother gets hit by a toaster? Buy a new toaster.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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