How do you get 100 Jews into a Volkswagon? You don't. It's impossible to fit that many people into a car that small.

Why did Little Billy trip? Because I shot his foot off.

Knock knock Who's there? Prosti Prosti who? Prostitute

Wanna hear a funny joke? Sure. Me too, do you have any?

Who is the funniest guy on this planet? Mike the Situation.

Knock knock. Who's there? 9/11. And you said you'd never forget.

Why can't Helen Kellen drive? She's a woman.

What do you call a bunch of black guys on mars? a problem What do you call 1 million black guys on mars? a bigger problem What do you call all the black guys on mars? a solution

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was sick and tired of all the repeated monkey jokes and commited suicide and preceded to fall out of the tree.

A person who doesn't know hungarian is trying to read the next sentence. Sajnos nem érti, mivel nem tud magyarul.

Why did the chicken cross the road? For a legitimate reason

After visiting the dentist, Ke$ha had sixteen cavities because brushing your teeth with bottles of jack causes plaque to build up.

why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead. why;d the banana fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the monkey.

Did you hear about the man who swam to the bottom of the ocean? He drowned

What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One is fun to smash with a sledgehammer. The other is a baby.

A chicken crosses the road and goes into a bar and recites the following poem: Roses are red Violets are blue Knock Knock Who's there? Sugar is sweet Sugar is sweet who? And so are you. The bartender was confused considering she's a blonde. A genie appears and says to the Mexican he'll grant him 3 wishes. The black guy, the white guy, and the jew were at the bar also. The priest was also drinking. They all had a great time.

Q: What do you call a real joke on anti joke A: Someone obviously don't understand the concept of this website

Why did Hitler kill so many Jews? Because he didn't like them.

Relax, I said some pretty vile things to you when I thought you where a guy seducing me while it became ever more apparent that you where pretending to be me, thing is I often use this site to vent my frustrations and earning the "praise" in the form of red thumbs by the people. I wont say your name, but I know who you are now, the girl with the big red scared eyes, I mean how many one handed 27 year old`s do I know? I am in my early thirties, that`s all I am willing to share for now, If people come around trying to poke out my remaining eye, I am ready (my waifu, is at her mother`s place, she knows I am still a wanted target by, well some people here and there.

What's the deal with brown?

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

Knock Knock Who's there? The FBI. We need to check your house for dead bodies.

If you have a large penis.give this joke a thumbs up. ( :

Roses are red. Waffles are blue. Blue Waffle.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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