There was 3 guys. A mexican, a black guy, and a jew. They work at a construction site and one day they found what appears to be a magic lamp. The mexican guy rubs the lamp hoping for a genie to appear and grant them wishes. Sure enough a genie appears. "I have been freed from the magic lamp." Says the genie "I shall grant one wish and one wish only to whoever rubbed the magic lamp." The mexican guy did not understand english. The jew steals the lamp and the black guy stabs him. The next day a blonde goes to the crime scene. He spot the magic lamp on the floor, picks it up, and rubs it. The genie appears. "I have been freed from the lamp. I shall grant one wish and one wish only to whoever rubbed the magic lamp." The blonde says "I wish Jose could speak ad understand english." Suddenly, the mexican appears and says "Thank you."

thumb_up thumb_down +3

how much blondes does it take to fix a light bulb 1 to buy the bulb 2 to put it up and 25 to think about what it does

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Lil Wayne's rapping career

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q: Why can't dinosaurs talk? A: Because they're all dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did Steven Hawkins die? he got a virus

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A obese woman, a anorexic woman and a average weight woman sit down to eat. They all have a good time.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

You are a special guy, and I mean that in a really sweet way, but a retard no. Synapses, tell me more please.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

knock knock who's there? the police, we have a warrant for your arrest.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Coming this fall, A hilarious movie for the whole family to enjoy, actor Rob Schneider play a very normal man would goes to work everyday to support his family who he loves more than anything in the world, critics are saying that this is the most vulgar slapstick comedy of the year as Rob Schneider teaches his two adopted kids the power of Jesus Christ. Coming this fall... The Nun's Birthday Rated R for excessive nudity of Rob Schneider and an asian hooker.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Knock Knock ? Whose's there ? The person you should be opening the door for The person you should be opening the door for who? Oh my god Frank open the goddamn door

thumb_up thumb_down +3

So, a boy walks into a baker's shop and asks for a loaf of bread. The man says "do you want white or brown?" The boy says "oh, I don't mind, I've got my bike outside."

thumb_up thumb_down +3

what is the difference between a jew and a boy scout? a boy scout comes home from camp

thumb_up thumb_down +3

how did the ant die? i stepped on it

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Roses are red violates are blue, matty is gay, sebby is too

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How many batteries does it take to run a car 1 a car battery

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and ferrari? I dont have a ferrari in my garage!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

You come home and find your family dead. What do you do? Take a picture, post it on facebook

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who gives a crap?

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? Sex

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What is black and blue, with nothing to do? The prostitute in my basement.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did Michael Jackson become white? Because he likes to molest children.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A bear walks into a bakerey. He aks for a loaf of bread. The bakers asks: "White or brown?" The bear answers: "It doesn't matter, I'm on the motorcycle".

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Mickey Mouse peed on a house. Just kidding. Micky Mouse isn't real.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops