Why did the girl buy the watermelon? To eat it.

What do you say to a friend named Alex? The Game

Big feet on a man means he has, Nothing, a man's foot size has no relation to the size of his penis.

What did the man's ex-wife told him after their divorce? "Build a bridge and get over did" And so he did because hes a contractor that specialized in structures spanning and providing passage over a gap or barrier, such as a river or roadway

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

how do you wake up lady gaga? you set her alarm for the intended time

so there are 2 muffins in an oven,1 says to the other "holy s**t its hot in here!" and the other says,"omg!its a talking muffin!"

What do you call a spaceman on Mars? Confused, because with the current technology it is impossible to send a human into space and onto Mars.

why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

Q: Why did the Japanese man fall off the cliff? A: He was pushed

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Not again!"

Q. How many blonds do you know? A. I don't know any blonds, but are you perhaps talking about blondes? Because if so, I still don't know any.

What do you call a blank white sheet of paper? Printer paper most likely

THIS ONE TIME MY DOG ATE A WHOLE CHEESECAKE

What does a muslim do on a plane? Flies to his intended destination without causing a problem.

Why can't Stevie Wonder read? He has retinopathy of prematurity and was born blind.

What 2 differences does a potato have in common? They both have very thin skin.

Whats black and white and read all over? A dead magpie.

Yo mamma so stupid Her IQ is sub par

Knock Knock Who's there? Me, wondering why your not naked.

A blinde and brunette are stranded on an island. They are never found and starve to death.

Why couldn't the boy talk? He drowned.

What is the difference between a dead baby and a mustang? I dont have a mustang in my garage.

An alphabet walks into the post office and asks for a letter. What does the postal worker give the alphabet? Nothing. Alphabets can't walk.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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