* Are you afraid of dinosaurs? * No, they're all dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did the chicken cross the road? Hold on. Let me think of an answer.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 was a rapist.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What do you call a lazy good-for-nothing who can't succed at anything, steals your money, and who is unskilled in every way? A women

thumb_up thumb_down +18

how do you get a girl of a swing? puch her off! how do you get her friend of a swing? throw a refridgerator at her!

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Roses are dead Violets are too Were all gonna die So are you.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What happens if you roll a nickel down a street in Mexico? It eventually stops and lands on its side.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Z.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

how do you get all the people in ireland out of their homes? roll a potato down the road. how do you find the richest person in ireland? you find the one who got the patato

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why couldn't the kid eat candy? He had diabetes, so he could put himself in danger and possibly result in death which would leave the family torn apart and all committing suicide in a matter of 10 years.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

How do u make Michael Jackson cry Dead people can't cry you dumb bitch

thumb_up thumb_down +18

why did the car drive off the cliff? The driver was a potato...

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Knock Knock? Who's there? EMS - your pregnant wife died it a car crash

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? answer: Where's my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down +16

why did the teacher say that the student did well in class? because the student did well in class

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Yo Mama is so white, people call her caucasian.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What's fat, round and bounces on the ground? A ball. I lied about the fat bit.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

How tall is oprah.. 5'7

thumb_up thumb_down +16

a pope and a catholic priest walk into a bar... the priest orders... then the pope says to the bartender "I'll have what hes having." so the bartender takes out a small child and says ...."are you sure?"

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What did the black man say to the white man? Hello

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the boy give the girl flowers? Because her parents died in a car crash and he felt bad.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Whats bloody and is dead. My son.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

How many ecotards does it take to change a light globe? Ve Vill Change all ze light globes to use;less grey vuns and you vill luv it or else ve vill kill you to save ze planet

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops