Knock knock Whos there? No one, your wife was just in a fatal car accident and died on the scene, so your kids had to walk home from school instead of being picked up. Your son Scotty was grabbed by the sexual predator 4 blocks from the school, and your daughter Sally tried to run and is now under the wheels on the bus going round and round.

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What is a black man's favorite food? It differs from person to person.

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why do my feet smell so bad? because i havent washed them for 5 days

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Why does annie put 2 balls together? bacuse its makes a BUTT! oo

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why did the Mexican take $20, because he found it on the ground

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Why did the blind man fail his math test? Because he had been raped and murdered. Going blind is a side effect of death.

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A 65 year old man is tired with his life. He begins to realize that it is meaningless to him. He wants no part in the world anymore so he decided to commit suicide. On his way to commit suicide, he comes across a magical man that has an extraordinary offer. This magical man has offered to grant the 65 year old man the power to fly. The 65 year old man, accepts the offer in great interest, but the magical man wants something in return for his deed. The 65 year old man, offers all the money in his wallet to the magical man. The magical man accepts his offer of all the money and continues. With a flick of the wrist, the magical man says, "fly, fly, high as the sky, i grant this man the ability to fly". The 65 year old man is greatly excited now that he has the ability to fly. He cant wait to try out his new power. He runs to the nearest cliff and jumps. Too bad the "magical man" was really a male prostitute that was broke and homeless. The 65 year old man died on impact and the male prostitue walked away with a wallet full of cash.

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What's the difference between a paper towel and a crab cake? Ones a paper towel and ones a crab cake

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I stole your wallet and used to buy a prostitute. I had a great time. What was the question again?

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What do you get when you cross an African, a white person, an Asian and a Spaniard? Society's worst nightmare

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How many ADD teenagers does it take to change a lightbulb? Most likely only one. With advances in modern medicine, adolescents are experiencing large improvements in their abilities to focus on things from schoolwork to lightbulb changing!

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knock knock whose there? you have AIDS

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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There are 3 types of people in this world; people who can count, and people who can't

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Q. Why did the middle-aged man need glasses? A. The man's father had poor eyesight and due to genetics could not see well without the help of glasses.

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What has a head but can't see? A penis.

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why didn't the printer work? it was in the toilet.

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What's sicker than "Friday" by Rebecca Black? Hitler's kill death ratio

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I am aware that my positivity makes me do some bad mistakes, but if negativity is the alternative I will keep taking my chances.

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your life

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Q: What's worse then 10 babies nailed to a tree? A: 1 baby nailed to 10 trees

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What's the same about a crouton and a pencil case? Both are used for dirty things, such as shoe tying.

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ever tried african food? they neither

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What do you call a Harry Beaver? A beaver with lots of hair.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops