Take this and put it- No.

Why did the woman spray a black man in the eyes with pepper spray, then promptly run away? Because the woman was a notorious criminal and was currently robbing the man's house, but was caught in the act so she used pepper spray as her last line of defense while she fled from the scene before the man could call the police to detain her and put her in prison for her crimes.

what did one white man say to the other white man? hello!

Why did the football coach go to the bank Answer - to get his quarter back

Three guys walk in to a bar. One got a concussion.

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

What's funnier than shooting a moose? The realization that the moose was Sarah Jessica Parker...

Why couldn't the black kid buy a bike? He had no money.

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You would run away too if your name was urdaagaa.

Your mother is so fat, that recent test results have proved she is morbidly obese.

What did Helen Keller say when she fell into a well? Nothing. She died upon impact and her family mourned her death for years.

How much cocain did Charlie sheen do? Enough to kill 2 and a half men

How do you stop a baby alien from crying? Watch what its mother does to soothe it and then try and copy that.

KARMA KARMA KARMA KARMA CHAMELEON

You are a special guy, and I mean that in a really sweet way, but a retard no. Synapses, tell me more please.

If God gives you lemons you find a new God

mary had a little lamb it's fleece was white as snow and everywhere that mary went it did a massive shit

Why did the chicken cross the road? We are not familiar with the specific circumstances, therefore its difficult to determine exactly why.

What did the fish say when it hit the big stone wall? DAM

AYE DEAD ON CAOIMHIN

What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? Sex

Q: What did Nala say to Simba during the stampede? A: Nothing. She was nowhere to be found during that scene.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because there was no oncoming traffic.

Q:Howd the blind kid find his way home? A:He didnt, he got lost and died of starvation.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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