dont be afraid of lard squeezing cause really its just me teasing

What did the sniper say when a newsreporter asked what he felt when he shot a terrorist? The sniper replied: Recoil.

Whats brown, large, thick, and sticky? a stick

What do you say when you wake up in the middle of the night and see your tv floating in mid air? Drop It Niggher!

What's the difference between a horse and a gorilla? Their penis size. Horses have relatively large penises, while gorillas are known to have the smallest penises proportional to their body size.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's Where am I

whats the best thing about life? whatever the best thing about life happens to be!

Two women are sitting on a park bench, minding their own business, saying nothing.

What did the ocean say the other ocean? Nothing, bodies of water are incapable of speech.

What's worse than a spilled ice cream cone? 2 spilled ice cream cones. What's worse than 2 spilled ice cream cones? 3 spilled ice cream cones. What's worse than 3 spilled I've cream cones? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? 4 spilled ice cream cones.

Roses are red Violets are silly Grease up your flaps Cause here comes my willy!

There is a bus full of puppies and babies with a plane flying above it carrying 2 tons of explosives. The Bus arrives safely at its destination.

Q) How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A) It shouldn't take more than one person to do this task, regardless of hair color.

What did the anti-social man say to a girl Nothing

Why did the Dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

I will create more jobs for americans

What do a Nazi and a Democrat have in common? They are both members of a highly supported political faction.

how fast does it take to kill a blonde? Give me a gun and i will find out

Your'e probably not going to laugh at this joke, it wasn't made to be funny

CAS

Every 5 seconds a child dies in Somalia. Good news is there are 4 second intervals when a child isn't dying in Somalia. I say kill them all

friend' Knock Knock! you; no one home go away

What did the mother say to her child that was washing the dishes? "Sweep the floor."

You know whats better than 24? 25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...