Why did the man think inside of the box? Because he was inside of the box.

roses are brown violets are brown, who took a shit in my garden

thre guys walk into a bar then goes to sit at a booth and the three guys have to go to the bathroom so they ask a waiter to safe they booth while they go to the bathroom 30 min later and they are still not back so the waiter goes by the door and one guy come out and the waiter asks " what were you doing" and the guy says " blowing bubbles " then goes and sit down " then the second guy come out and the waiter asks " what were you doing " and the guy says " blowing bubbles" and goes and sits down then the last guy come out and the waiter says " let me guess blowing bubble " the guy says back "no i am bubbles "

Two scuba divers are playing cards on the bottom of the ocean. One asks "have you got amy threes?" Then they both die from maintained exposure to the incredible pressure at the bottom of the sea. One left behind three children.

Why was the chicken afaid to cross the road? because there was no road.

Whats worse then biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into an apple and finding half a worm. Wats worse then biting into an apple and finding half a worm? Biting into an eggplant and finding half a worm, as eggplants are usually more expensive so you will have wasted more money and would probably not be willing to eat the rest. And eggplants taste like shit.

What's the difference between a lawyer and a vampire? Lawyers exist, are alive and despite all claims to the contrary, can withstand sunlight, garlic and the sign of the cross. They also have reflections and whilst they may eat black pudding from time to time they don't depend on blood as a source of nutrition.

Then that means that, I thought I was working with you? No wonder things did not work out, no wonder jerks like Jonas "the wizard" got inside my team, he was recommended by this "Axel Knight"

Do u know where the glue is? nope, i just glued my hand to this table, so im no help to u

How many pollacks does it take to screw in a lightbuld? Likely the same number as is required when people of non-polish descent screw in lightbulds. Overall however it is variable based on the number or bulbs, position of bulbs in relation to ceiling, potential shakiness of required ladder, and desired efficiency. Please reference GE's lightbuld home instillation handbook for further information or alternately contact your local electrician or handy neighbor.

Q:Why did the Grape divorce the Prune? A:Because he was tired of Rasin kids! :D

What can an elevator do that a mexican can't? Raise a family.

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

There once was a man from Nantucket Who was stung on the head by a wasp When asked if it hurt he replied, 'not a bit, and he could do it again if he'd like to.'

what do you call a black clerk? one of the 2 billion people with a job, u bum!

why was the pen mad at the pencil? it wasnt. objects don't have feelings

Why did the blonde ask the doctor if she should get a new butt? She is insecure about its appearance and believes reconstructive anal surgery is the only solution.

What's worse than a baby in a blender? Two babies in a blender

Why did the Japanese man commit suicide? He was terminally ill and decided it was his time to go

A hermaphrodite walks into a bakery, orders an eclair, then leaves.

How do you get a clown off a swing set? You throw an axe at his head when he's not looking.

What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? Whatever you like, it can't hear you.

What's black and white and red all over? A skunk in a blender.

Knock, knock -The door's open.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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