Bob: Hey bro Jim: ... Bob: You're dead! Jim: Yep.

Abbie shaved her arse today....then it smiled at me

what did the boy with no arms and legs get for chrismas ? cancer

David shut the fuck up your cat has asthma and i dropped a weight on its little fucking head that pikey should of drowned it furthermore your sister looks like a greasy alien

What's the difference between a bird? Both legs are the same, especially the left one

A man walked in to a bar, he ordered a few drinks, met some new friends and had a good laugh with them. Later that night, he got in his car and drove home, which was foolish, as he should have known that being under the influence of alcohol increases the percentage of a collision, which could take his life and the lives of others. He arrived home just fine and got in to bed with his wife who was happy to see him.

What is worse than getting a bad grade on a test. Having your family dog bled out in front of you, bitch.

Once a upon of time, there was a very big kangaroo named Jake. Well one day Jake was eating some food when suddenly a bunch of humans came and saw him. One human name Willie went over to take some pictures of the animal. The Jake ran away.

A: you have a strong arm. B: yea i work ou- A: you can master bate a whale.

At home, 3:20 pm - Close eyes for 10 mins, it's 3:30. At school, 3:20 pm - Close eyes for 20 mins, it's 3:40 and schools been finished for ten minutes.

why cant stevie wonder read? because hes black

What's dirtier than an ice cream cone rolled in dirt? The dirt it was rolled in.

what do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? a stick

Want to hear the funniest joke in the world? I forget how it goes but it ends with the abolishment of slavery.

Why did George Bush blow up the Twin Towers on 9/11? 9/12 was his girlfriends birthday.

What's the difference between a bike and a black man? I don't know how to ride a bike.

216-409-7176 Call me.

Why was the boy sad? Because He had a frog stapled to his face

When do you call 911? When you need help with do something that you either can't do alone or can't control

An arab says allahu akbar, people respect him as he is pronouncing his religion in his place of worship

A guy says to a palm reader "You look like you've seen a ghost. Palm reader replies "You've got cum on your hand."

A kid walked into a bar and ordered a drink and then was arrested for drinking under the age of 18

Why is Osama bin laden so hard to find? Because he is dead.

Whats white and bad for your teeth? A refridgerator

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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