What's green, fuzzy, and can kill you if it fell from a tree? A pool table.

The U.S. economy is in poor condition and it's downfall would have repercussions throughout the entire world.

What do you call a needy person? A person whos needs need needs.

"Hello, is this the Krusty Krab?" "No, this is Patrick."

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was an avocado

knock knock whos their a person

Q: Why do some women insist they don't have penises or testicles? All humans have penises and testicles! A: These women have been brainwashed by feminism. It's quite sad, really.

What do you get when you cross a pumpkin with a kangaroo? An irrelevant punchline.

What's worse than getting dumped? Being molested by a crazy hobo

What do you say to a homeless man sat in a train station? That there is a homeless shelter around the corner.

Do you know the reason people like sleeping? It's because they have good dreams. Ooh la la.--

Did you fall on your head when you were a baby Oh, I very sorry.

Why did the little boy run away from the beach? Hurricane Irene.

the only thing funny about this website is the fact ciaran hawkins is in love with it

whats white and big and white? alot of things...

What's great about taking a shower with a twelve year old girl. Pulling her hair back and making her look like a six year old

why did the chicken cross the road? no one knows because it got hit by a bus.

An Italian man with a very thick accent decides to travel to America. On arriving, he decides to take a taxi and tour the nearby city. The man, feeling hungry after a while, chooses to stop at a bakery. Upon entering the bakery, the man walks up to the display of bread, and points at the loaves of bread he wanted, calling to the baker "I want 2 piece." The baker, not understanding the man's accent asks the man to repeat what he said. So the man repeats, "I want 2 piece, right here, right now." "Sure thing," the baker says, and gives the man the loaves of bread.

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Why did the lebanese man kill his own family? He had cancer.

What did the pencil say to the pen? Nothing.

knock knock come in!

What did the black man do when his Polish friend died of cancer? He fertilized his front lawn as it was beginning to burn due to overexposure of the sun.

ur mamas so ugly cause when she looked up at the sky it started to rain

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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