What did the grape say when the elephant sat on it? Nothing, scientific research has shown over thousands of years that grapes cannot talk.

knock knock whos there? orange orange who? orange you pissed off your wifes taking in the ass from another guy right now?

Poop

Why was the dwarf nicknamed The Anaconda? Because everybody loves a bit of irony.

What do you get when you cross Winter Squash, Beets, Ham, Coffee, Spinach, Hexamine, Cadmium, Detergent, and some love? A bowl full of crap.

Knock knock

what did the guy say before he went to kill the other guy? Im killing you

A lysdexic man tries to spell rentally metarded.

wots brown and smells like shite shite

what is big, grey and sits in the middle of a field. A filing cabinet

69

How did Hitler fit 100 Jews in his car? Ashes don't take up much space.

"Ask me a question." "No" "Cheese" ... "What?"

What's the difference between a duck?

What do you get when you combine a potato and an apple? A nice Apple Potato Souffle...

What do you call cheese that isn't your's Well it would depend on what type of cheese it actually is

Two dogs went out for a walk. Then their master took them home.

What did the coin said when it got flipped ? Nothing, coins do not have sufficient requirements to be able to talk like we humans do.

why was the old man cold? ...WHY?

September 11 was the 9/11 of all terrorist attacks.

Too bad, because UNTIL YOUR FUCKING "POWER OF HUMAN KIND" CAN SUMMON UP A FUCKING EYEBALL! NOTHING WILL MAKE UP FOR THIS SHIT! "Oh, my the good old phonebook, I will... Now... try... to... seduce... you... with... my... "goodness" As far as "oh I know where you live", well nobody here is hiding fagface! So you come out of your "darkness or shadows or whatever" and let me stab out both your fucking eyes! And we are STILL NOT GOOD! And yeah, have your faggots stop calling themselves Nero.

you put the chevy to the levy when your pants fell heave diarea

what do you get when you cross an elephant with a lake? swimming trunks.

Did you hear about the sick juggler? Turns out he had cancer on his brain tumour.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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