How much is that doggie in the window? $4.95 + Shipping&Handling

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How do you define an unsatisfactory kitchen? It won't have a woman chained to the oven.

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Your dad is so fat, that eventually he got on Biggest Loser and ended living a very successful life.

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What's the easiest way to load dead babies into a tractor trailer? Pitchfork.

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Two apples are hanging from a tree. They are both picked, sold, taken home, washed, and enjoyed by a family of three.

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Why did the audience walk out of the movie? Because it had just finished.

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Roses are red. Violets are red. Your garden's on fire.

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Why are you late? Sorry, I would have been here sooner, only I wasn't.

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Y

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What has a head but can't see? A penis.

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Why did the baby boy start crying? He got hit with a toaster

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knock knock who's there ?

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A guy walks into a bar, orders a drink, and nothing interesting happens.

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Yo mama is so fat she has a gym membership and a diet plan to lose weight

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Q. Why did the middle-aged man need glasses? A. The man's father had poor eyesight and due to genetics could not see well without the help of glasses.

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Yeah i'm into fitness, Fitness whole pizza in my mouth.

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What did death say to life? Go die

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Susie had no arms and no legs.. what did she get for Christmas? Cancer. Amy was riding on a swing.. who was pushing her? Not Susie.

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how much did the asian man pay for his operation? nothing. he's dead.

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Q: why did the boy cross the road A: because he was being chased by a pedophile

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The family performs an array of disgusting sexual acts. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "It has no name."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Chicken is a funny word, and the road is a plot device.

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Why did the male propagate the female? Because he was drugged. Slyly, this foxy female had slipped the male the date rape drug and a dangerous amount of viagra. During intercourse, the male ripped a gaping hole in the female's stomach and killed her. He woke up confused inside a dead stinking corpse.

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just a man and his thoughts....and a smart phone app, and a loving family, thats not the point.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops