What would a prostitute do if she was given a million dollars? She would probably diversify her portfolio. First, she would pay her rent. She would buy some groceries and a present for her mother. She would then invest it in stocks and low-yield bonds. She would they buy a vehicle. This win might not affect her continuance in her job.

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How do you make a toddler run faster? Chase it with a lawnmower.

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what did the kid with poleo get for christmas. whatever he has on his christmas list because his parents feel bad for passing down the genetic information(DNA) that gave him poleo.

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Q:Why was 6 afraid of seven? A:Because seven ate (eight) nine

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If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed. I will also remove you from my friends list on Facebook because stealing isn't nice.

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What happened to the cow that couldn't moo? It died because it could not make it's needs known to it's fellow herd and was bullied and isolated.

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Q: Why did the clown fall off the swing? A: Because he was shot in the face

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Why did Tupac Shakur get shot? He was a famous and very controversial celebrity, which naturally led to having a lot of enemies.

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Andy Carrol

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whats worse than having a gay friend ? 9/11

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Why was the kid running around? He was on fire

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What do you call a boy with no arms and no legs in the water? Bob What do you call that same kid when he's at your doorstep? Matt What do you call that same kid when he's hanging in your room? I don't know, but you should stop calling him names.

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Why did Lucy have blond hair? Answer: Because both her parents had recessive traits.

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how does an Arab scare someone He does a countdown

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hi will

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Did you hear about the mail man without a mail truck? He walked

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Guess what what?? chicken butt!!!!!

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they

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Ever had sex while camping? It's great.

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because it lacked the requisite musculature to facilitate locomotion

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hey John will you make some copies

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Roses are red. Violets are red. Daisies are red. WHY IS MY GARDEN ON FIRE?

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what do you call a tall skiny kid with a very big ego autistic.........colby schluter.

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Q. what is catness and pita name together pines

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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