a man walks into a bar and quickly notices a young lady having a drink. He sits beside her and asks 'why the long face?' 'My mother was raped by a horse.'

thumb_up thumb_down -23

what happens when steven hawking walks into a bar? everyone cheers at the miracle of science.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Q:Whats Brown and sticky? A:Maple Syrup

thumb_up thumb_down -23

do you have a pen i can borrow? yeah, here.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

why was the woman in the kitchen? she was being held hostage there by Bob Saget

thumb_up thumb_down -23

MR MR WHO?? MR MC CANN

thumb_up thumb_down -23

How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? ...hey, it's kinda fun to type tootsie... ...tootsie tootsie tootsie...

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What do you get on anti-jokes.com? A bunch of repeated "jokes", that don't make any sense.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why do they give old people Viagra at nursing homes? Because erectile function decreases with increasing age, and it would be unfair to needlessly deny senior citizens the right to consensual intercourse if that is what they want.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

If an orange is orange then why isn't a banana called a yellow? Because the word 'banana' comes from the Arabic word for finger as it obviously resembles a finger. The person that named the orange was equally lazy, but just not Arabic.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Q. What did the fat man say when he ate a salad? A. Yum.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

a black guy walks into a black bar

thumb_up thumb_down -25

If a guy has a sex change what is the first thing he would say? Boobies!

thumb_up thumb_down -25

roses are red violets are blue does this smell like chloroform

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What did the suspicious Hunchback say? I've got a hunch.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

How many jews does it take to- I have alzheimers

thumb_up thumb_down -25

How much dub could a dubstep dub if a dubstep could step dub?

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Roses are red Violets are blue I have altzhiemers Cheese on toast.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

There once was a plain Cheerio. He has a decent life with a low paying job and an apartment. One day, he decided to make his life more fun and started going to parties. He met some women and had a good time. He was happier and was soon promoted at work. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself, only to discover that he was now a Honey-nut Cheerio. He continued to go to parties and met a girl that eventually became his girlfriend. He became a manager at work and moved into an expensive condo. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself and was a Frosted Cheerio. He then quit his job and opened a club, where he became the most popular Cheerio in town. All guys wanted to be him, girls with him. At one party, his girlfriend asked him for some punch. He went to the kitchen but couldn't find any. There was no punch-line.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A black man walks into KFC. the whole room..THE GAME.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

roses are red violets are black lewis norris has a fucking narra back

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Whats bad about being a black jew? You have to sit in the back on the oven.............

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What can fly, but can not swim? Malaysia Airlines Flight 370

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops