Which came first, the chicken or the egg? The Big Bang. -BG_Shank_A

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

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haha Otarts was here

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What happends to a monkey without arms.. He bleeds..

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One out of every 3 smokers dies.................. the rest gain immortality.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 took sexual advantage of 9.

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What do you call a man with no arms and legs? An amputee

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Why did the man eat the cheese? because the man was a mouse

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How do you call a cat for it's dinner? Come here cat!

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.der era sesoR .eulb era steloiV .sdrawkcab nettirw saw ecnetnes sihT .yrgnuh m'I won dnA

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What's purple and tastes like grapes? Grapes

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A little boy went to a sleep over . They watched a episode of pokemon and the flashing lights triggered the boys epilepsy he was driven to hospital and is recovered.

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Q. Why did the middle-aged man need glasses? A. The man's father had poor eyesight and due to genetics could not see well without the help of glasses.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To avoid being killed in the slaughter house.

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how many babies dose it take to paint a fence it depends on how hard you throw them

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A man walks into a bar. He orders a beer.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the cross light said signal said "GO"

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A man walks into a bar, orders a drink, drinks it, and leaves.

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YOUR MOM SHOT YOU OUT HER ASS!!!

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Some people devote their life to talking in their head. Jesus christ.

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There once was the worlds most important people on an airplane. All of them. They were a Boy Scout with a hiking pack, World's Oldest person, World's Smartest person, a Scientist who had the cure to cancer, and the World's Richest man. The Pilot told them that the plane was running out of gas and they would have to bail. But there was a problem, two people were going to have to die. They were only two parachutes short. So the Scientist grabbed one and said, "I'm the only one with the cure to cancer I've got lives to save." And he bails. Then the World's oldest person jumps out with a parachute saying, "I Still Have A Life To Live!!!" Then the Richest person realizes there is two parachutes left. He says, "I have the most money so I have to go because I could save America from going bankrupt." Grabs a chute and jumps. Then, the world's smartest person just happens to be so selfish and bails with the last Parachute. So the Pilot and and the Boy Scout were left. The pilot was kind enough to let the Kid go because he still had he longest life to live. But the kid said no, we could both go. The pilot said no you go. The kid was still being stubborn. And said No, we could both go, The world's smartest person took my back pack, there is one chute left, we could share it. And so they both jumped and landed safely on the ground. And that was the end of the World's smartest man.

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Roses are red Violets are blue The last time I saw your mom I made you

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What did Newton say to Einstein? Nothing, Newton was dead before Einstein's birth.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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