What's green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

I grunt when I poop.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Have you accepted Jesus Christ as your lord and savior?

thumb_up thumb_down -10

why couldn't Hellen Keller scream when she fell of a building? She was wearing mittens.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

6 was afraid of 7 because 7 8 9

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Whats worse than a bee sting? 2 bee stings Whats worse than 2 bee stings? A car crash Whats worse than a car crash? 3 bee stings

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you get when you cross a dead monkey, a chair fitted with wheels for use as a means of transport by a person, Isaac Newton & the creator of the website? Stephen Hawking.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did the Black man get after a month's worth of manual labour? A reasonable wage, that was above the national minimum wage standard which states his and everyones right to a certain amount of money

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did the man say when he was having sex with his wife? That feels quite good.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What is brown red and white? I don't know, that's why I asked you

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why Do Girls Have holes?? For the guys poles.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's the best part about having sex with a 9 year old in the shower? Pedophilia is a crime, and the people that do it are very sick individuals. The fact that you even thought there was a 'best' part disgusts me.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A cat walks into a bar and says.......Meow

thumb_up thumb_down -10

An irish man walks into a bar. He drinks responsibly, and leaves shortly afterward.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

White boy in jail. "That ish crazy!!"

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you call a Muslim that walks onto a plane? A passenger

thumb_up thumb_down -12

I took a shower yesterday. You have no idea how hard it was sneaking that thing out of Home Depot.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How do you scare a brunette? Hide behind a door or wall until the unsuspecting person walks by, then jump out and yell.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Hey, look over there! It's ur mom!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have a gun Get in the van

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Knock Knock Who's there? 9/11

thumb_up thumb_down -12

An owl and a squirrel were sitting on a tree branch. An acorn fell on the squirrel's head and surprised, the owl moved its head 3.276 degrees to the right. The squirrel apologized for the inconvenience, but the owl would not listen, so flew off to buy a ferry to help children with terminal illnesses get to school.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Whats worst than stubbing your toe? The Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops