What is white and will kill you if it fell out of a tree? Charles Manson

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A man walked into the woods with alzheimers......pancakes

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Cancer.

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How do you make a 4 year old cry? You tell him all his family died in a horrible plane crash.

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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Why did the fat kid fall of his bike? The skinny kid pushed him off!

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whats better then a pile of dead babies? 2 piles of dead babies

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Yo mama is so fat she probably has diabetes, poor circulation in her extremities, and cannot ride anything at Disney World.

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A woman crashes her car into a pole Thier family is suing for a hit and run

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What time is it? I just looked at my clock on the wall. It is 9:14 AM Eastern Standard Time.

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What do you call a Mexican that doesn't have a lawn mower? An honest working induvidual that just so happens to live in the city and does not own a lawn mower

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What did Santa give little Susie for Christmas? Nothing, he raped her.

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What's the deal with airline food? Nothin. It's quite scrumcious.

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Superman vs Batman real fight: Batman: Hmm I believe that Superman might want to fight m*squish* Batman explodes in a bunch of meat as a blue and red blur is seen fly by. Extended Edition: Batman: Hah Superman I got kryptonite gloves so if you would just stand close to them for about five minute...*squish* Batsack of meat left we see nothing because Superman is FASTER THAN A SPEEDING BULLET. They are probably gonna go like every fucking crossover, first they squabble and throw a few punches for five minutes, then they realize that the LAX LADDER LEX LUGER AND LEX LUTHOR brothers made up some fake story so sups and bts kill each other while they blow up the world, so Btz, and Soup end up beating them up... Moral: "PFF! BATMAN HAS BEATEN UP SUPERMAN AND THE HULK IN THOUSANDS OF SHlTTY NON CANON STORIES!" (In where the one with the Hulk described the hulk to have the instincts and combat skills of a "dumb, animal like confused ape" yes actual quote, Batman punched this confused green ape across a door and kept beating "The Hulk" up as he ran around in "animalistic fear and "rage" receiving random kicks by Batman, then Btz throws some capsule that turns into a fishbowl with no oxygen that chokes The Hulk (supposedly to death) in a few seconds... The Hulk can like hold his breath for YEARS in space, (but you know these lethal fishbowls)

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What’s the difference between a frog and a duck? One is a frog and one is a duck.

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What's the difference between Micheal Jackson and a grocery bag? One carries groceries and the other molests children

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Why does the St. Johns River flow north? Because Georgia Sucks.

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Why did the pied piper eat tea half past three? Because the chicken tripped on the way across the street and the fat lady didn't sing.

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A blonde walks into a bar a uses the restroom. She needed to pee.

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How many blondes does it take to walk into a bar? One I guess. I don't know if I understand the question.

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I love Japan. It's the bomb.

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Why was the boy upset? His penis fell off and his mom was making him go to the library.

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Your mom is so stupid that she didn't get into college due to her low act score of 16. She feels the need to improve so she asked me to tutor her.

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How many band geeks does it take to catch a football? One, especially if he/she is on the football team.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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