What's greasier than a baby? A burger

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What does the thirsty butcher drink? Chocolate milk. Because he can.

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KNOCK KNOCK who's there? hello is anybody there? hello?....... .....the number your trying to reach has been removed please hang up the door knob and put the squirrel back in the lawnmower were it belongs.

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What's big, brown, and full of crap? A septic tank.

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what happend when the little boy went on the rollercoaster ? It crashed.

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i dont care if you rate me or not

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A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" the Eggman and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

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what did the old man say to the older man? "hey".

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What's a lil plus a lot A little more then a lot

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Whats werst than taking candy from a baby. Throwing a baby off a cliff then eating the candy in fronts of its parents

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Jeff: Did you know, someone called you an owl? Billy: Who?

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What is green and has wheels A blue bucket, I lied about the green and the wheels

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Skinny guy: Hey wanna hear a yo mama joke? Fat mother: Hey you wanna die?

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Q. whats red and sits in a hairdressers? A. a baby getting its hair cut with a potato peeler

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Nice story but I wish it would have had a good point like... A moral? Moral: Need a light?

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What do You call a man with no arms or legs? Dead, He died of blood loss 3 hours ago

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what kind of dog has no tail? a hot dog

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Superman and Batman get in a fight, who wins? No one the world has just lost a superhero.

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How do you get 100 Africans in a phone box? Throw a can of beans in there.

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roses are red voliets are blue u actule thought i would cry over you!

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Twelve billion Nero, you puppy dog you hot blooded latino man. Why cant I control it myself?

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Why was the blonde in the bathroom for 2 hours. She had to pee really bad.

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We are unhappy, unfilled because we cannot complete our dream, it is always about us, then again, is wanting the best for others being selfish?

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Uh, well I think of it as quirky and charming, odd weird, maybe unexpected, I could have looked it up but I am dying of lack of sleep here.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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