A deaf man sits down puts on his headphones presses play on his ipod starts to nod his head and realises what he has just done

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Why did Jimmy never like old people? Because he was abused as a child by one.

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One day i woke up, and found my wife dead on the floor. lol.

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What starts with the letter P and ends with 'orn'? Porn....

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brock has small hands for a small job

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why was little jonny not playing in the baseball game? his legs were shattered in a terrible lawn mowing accident.

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Q. What did batman say to Robin before they got in the car? A. Get in the car Robin.

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What was the first thing that went through the mind of the first 9/11 jumper? Thank god I only jumped from the first floor.

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An astronaut walks into a bar. He orders a beer. After waiting for about 1 and a half minutes he receives his beer. The bartender says it was 3 dollars. The astronaut checks his wallet and finds no money so he pays with credit card. The bartender swipes his credit card but the card doesn't work. So the astronaut takes out his debit card. When the bartender swipes the debit card it worked. In relief the astronaut looks at the bartender and says "Thank you" and then goes home.

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What do you call a dear with no eyes? no eyed dear what do you call a dear with no head? dead!

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What happened to the baby bird? It fell out the nest

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A man walks into his local store, he gets a basket and get a tin of beans, an apple, some kitchen rolls a bag of potatoes and an 8 pack of sausages. He walks to the checkout and the lady working asks him ''Are you single?'' He replies ''Yes, i am actually, how did you know?'' The lady then says ''Because your Ugly as Sin''

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HOLY SHIT, THIS ACTUALLY WORKS!! 1. Hold your breath? for 5 minutes. 2. Die

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What do a plum and a rabbit have in common? They are both purple except for the rabbit.

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a, b, c, d, e, f, g, h, i, j, k, l, m, n, o, p, q, refrigerator.

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We can never ask enough hypothetical questions, can we? Well?

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What does a black man love more than anything? His family you racist c u n t.

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Wanna know what is gross? a dead baby in a dumpster. Grosser? Ten dead babies in a dumpster. Grosser? There is a live one at the bottom. Grosser? It ate its way out. Grosser? It came back for seconds.

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What did Chuck Norris say to the puppy? Aww what a cute dog.

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Two men are in a bar. One of them turns to the other one and says, "I've slept with your mom." The other one replies "Go home dad you're drunk."

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roses are red, violets are blue, your boyfriends thinks i'm hot that's why he dumped you

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yo momma is so stupid, she probably in in the bottom 1% of her age group

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What's black and white and red all over? Michael Jackson after being hit by a train.

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What do you call a Mexican in a kitchen? A chef.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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