Jeff: Did you know, someone called you an owl? Billy: Who?

thumb_up thumb_down -15

what kind of dog has no tail? a hot dog

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do You call a man with no arms or legs? Dead, He died of blood loss 3 hours ago

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Nice story but I wish it would have had a good point like... A moral? Moral: Need a light?

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What is green and has wheels A blue bucket, I lied about the green and the wheels

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Q. whats red and sits in a hairdressers? A. a baby getting its hair cut with a potato peeler

thumb_up thumb_down -15

You're flying above the Kansas Ocean, you lose your brakes and have to paddle all the way to shore. How many dogs can you fit on a carousel? Blue, because Ice Cream is cold.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A polar bear walks into a bar, sits down, and says, "Can I have a.........................beer?" The bartender asks, "Why the large pause?" The bear responds, "I have a speech impediment"

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the father smash his sons head into the dentist's building? Because he had a locker in his mouth. Also, equestrian.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist -Tag

thumb_up thumb_down -15

i dont care if you rate me or not

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" the Eggman and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What's a lil plus a lot A little more then a lot

thumb_up thumb_down -15

what did the old man say to the older man? "hey".

thumb_up thumb_down -15

what happend when the little boy went on the rollercoaster ? It crashed.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

what is the germans word for fat dick what is very fat hairy dick

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Did you hear about the 2 pretzels walking down the street? It's not true, pretzels are not capable of autonomous movement.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What does the thirsty butcher drink? Chocolate milk. Because he can.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What's greasier than a baby? A burger

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Q) What is black, white, and red all over? A) A zebra that just became the kill of a hungry carnivore

thumb_up thumb_down -15

why is this joke funny because your laughing

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What's big, brown, and full of crap? A septic tank.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

KNOCK KNOCK who's there? hello is anybody there? hello?....... .....the number your trying to reach has been removed please hang up the door knob and put the squirrel back in the lawnmower were it belongs.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops