What is makes you more happy to see than a dead baby? A dead baby dressed up as a clown.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: One little blond girl went walking on her own. A: 17 didn't come back.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How do you get a black man down from a tree? If the man cannot climb down himself, perhaps call the fire department.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Ask me if I'm a horse. Are you a horse? No.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why can't we see the wind? Because no one likes you...

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A dog walk into a bar, and the bartender asks, "What"ll it be?" The dog then breaks into tears as he realizes the bartender is his father's gay husband.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What Happens when you shoot a deer? It's Dead

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Tin is a chemical element with symbol Sn (for Latin: stannum) and atomic number 50. It is a main group metal in group 14 of the periodic table. Tin shows chemical similarity to both neighboring group-14 elements, germanium and lead, and has two possible oxidation states, +2 and the slightly more stable +4. Tin is the 49th most abundant element and has, with 10 stable isotopes, the largest number of stable isotopes in the periodic table. It is a silvery, malleable other metal that is not easily oxidized in air, obtained chiefly from the mineral cassiterite where it occurs as tin dioxide, SnO2.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

I wrote a joke for 'Anti-Joke', I laughed, it was funny.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why shouldn't you worry about having a baby? Because with all these jokes, babies aren't even going to be around anymore. "What's funnier than a dead baby?" "A dead baby in a clown costume"

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's better than having sex with your mother? Nothing. I'm in love with her, son.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A Dog walks into a bar to order a drink. The bar patrons are at first amused and overjoyed to share their night with a playful pet, until they see that his mouth is foaming and he's already started trying to eat the nearest child. Screams erupt as the bartender calls 911. The dog manages to injure two patrons before he is tazed by the police and taken to be put down. One of the men injured has to have his arm amputated, which is unfortunate for his new career as a heart surgeon. The hospital informs him that they have no choice but to force him to resign, after they hand him his lengthy medical bill. He ends up losing his apartment, and his fiance leaves him for someone more stable financially. The man then drinks himself to death, after attacking and killing a local dog with his one remaining hand. The dog belonged to a new family on the block, whose son had terminal cancer. Due to the cancer, the boy had trouble making friends in a new area, and the dog (Sonny) was his one source of companionship and, by extension, hope. The boy is later admitted to the hospital for breathing problems, and after a 4-hour surgery, is pronounced dead. His attending physician was quoted as saying "He was so close to beating back the infection, but all of a sudden it seemed like he just... gave up." I mean, how was a dog supposed to order a drink in the first place, am I right?

thumb_up thumb_down +1

♪ It's raining. It's pouring. ♪ The old man caught pneumonia and died....

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's the difference between Donald Trump and a refrigerator? Open a refrigerator and you will find food, typically refrigerated food like milk, eggs, you know, stuff like that.... When you open Donald Trump you will be charged with murder.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

The woman says : OMG I am so hung over!! The man next to her has Terrible tourertts turns around and shouts I want my to make them hung over your face, her then moves away and rapes a apple of which he is eating, the woman turns around and dies as she has a brain tumor

thumb_up thumb_down +1

what kind of road kill is green and smells like cookies? girl scouts

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What has 156 bras and 927 pairs of underwear? Someone without a washing machine.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the disabled child say when I hit him with my car? *thunk*

thumb_up thumb_down +1

I17. I17. I17. That was my best impression of a Bingo caller.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

The other day I was talking to this guy... Nice guy

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What is Wonder Woman's drug of choice? Heroine.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

this girl and guy were sitting on my couch turns out its my sister and her boyfriend and she just farted

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What happened as a result of the bitter terrorist attack? The president began to devise a plan to help the abused child

thumb_up thumb_down +1

a jew walked into a bar-mitzvah

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops