Knock Knock! Who's there? Banana! Banana who? Knock knock! Who's there? Banana! Banana who? Knock knock! Who's there? Orange! Orange who? Orange you glad I didn't stab you 17 times in the kidney?

whats funny about female tennage life? SELF HARM OOOOO YEAHHHH

jack and jill climbed up the hill but they were bagels

So, a man walks into a bar, and he ends up in intensive care, because the bar was very hot and gave him severe burns. He was on business in an industrial park.

Why did the wife leave her husband? Because they were having sexual differences and time restraints. The husband worked nightshifts as a nurse while the woman stayed home and took care of their child. The husband confessed he never wanted a child in the first place, and that having sexual intercourse with her didn't truly satisfy him.

What do a black man and an elephant have in common? They are both multi-cellular organisms, they both belong to the kingdom Animalia, the phylum Chordata, and the class Mammalia, they both possess vertebrae, they both move through legged locomotion, they both possess knee joints and they both possess the capacity for altruistic behavior.

What's the difference between the sky and the ocean? They're both blue

What did the disabled child say when I hit him with my car? *thunk*

There is a Mexican, American, and an Italian on a boat.They start to sink. All of them brought things from their country. The Mexican threw burritos over and said, "We have too much of these." The American threw american cheese over and said, "We have too much of these in our country." The Italian throws over pizza and says the same thing. They are still sinking. Then, the American picks up the Mexican, throws him over and says, "We have too much of these in our country."

9 Cats on a boat. One Jumped off, how many left? 8.

Why did the cow go over the hill? He didn't. He was pinned and slaughtered in a private owned animal torture facility.

Abbie shaved her arse today....then it smiled at me

A: you have a strong arm. B: yea i work ou- A: you can master bate a whale.

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She didn't. Her head was stuck in the oven.

Q: What do you call a black man in space? A: An astronaut. -Ap

Whats white and bad for your teeth? A refridgerator

Why didn't the Jew laugh at the joke concerning his familial genealogy in relation to WW2? He had orofacial paralysis and was therefore physically incapable of expressing joy through the means of his mouth

Ask me for £1000 Can I have £1000 No get a job

i was gunna write a joke..but i took an arrow to me knee.

Why is John single? Because women are materialistic.

Whiney the poo and the blustery day.

Hey, I just met you... No, I'm your brother. You've known me for 30 years. You must have memory loss.

A man walked into a bar. Ouch.

Why did the little girls ice cream melt? Because she was on fire.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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