Why did the bear turn red? Because I fucking stabbed it!

"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "Interrupting Owl." "Interrupting Owl who?"

How did the boyfriend react when the girlfriend told him she was pregnant? Nothing.. He already changed his number and packed up his things and moved out of the state

How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

What would you call a two-foot Irishman named Max? Max.

Ding Dong! Who's the - - - wait - - - I don't have a doorbell.

Why did the man starve to death? He had no food.

There were two smokestacks, a little one and a big one. One day, the little one said to the big one, "I'm tired of being the lesser of two smokestacks!"

Knock Knock. Who's there? Scott Scott who? Scott Henderson. Oh my god Scotty! I haven't seen you since highschool, please come in.

How much wood would Chuck Wood have if Chuck Wood could have wood? None, Chuck Wood has E.D.

Whats worse than not having cellphone service? Having sex unwillingly with a stranger then getting pregnant at the age of 13.

How do you kill off a zombie apocalypse? Laser vision

a man makes a bad joke

Why do vampires suck blood? Because they re crazy.

Justin Bieber.

How do you fit a whale into a truck bed? You can't, whales live in the ocean.

knock knock whos their? kevin kevin who? knock knock huh? queef

A black man walks into a store with a gun. He is a policeman bringing in a murder weapon as part of his investigation.

your skull would make a nice pen holder

Q:What happened when the black guy walked into the bar? A:He bought a drink and quietly drank it until he was finished.

What did the pregnant teen get for Christmas? A miscarriage

What poops,smells bad,burps,wears diapers,farts,and screams spank me with a bib on That Depends what you do on saturday nights

If I had xray vision I'd go to a black jack table and when the dealer dealt everyone there cards I would look at the hot girls boobs

Who was the best Call of Duty World at War Player? A: Hitler he had 6 million kills and only 1 death

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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