Why do people poke people on facebook? Because they have no friends and will die alone

What did the guy say to the mushroom? You're a fungi

Whats 10 times worse than a war? Ten wars.

how many dirty stinkin apes does it take to put in a lightbulb? 3 dirty stinkin apes, 1 dirty stinkin ape to put in the lightbulb and 2 dirty stinkin apes to throw feces at each other

What did the Muslim do when he got on the bus? He realized he was in the wrong place and got on a plane and blew it up.

Roses are red Violets are actually the color violet, contrary to popular belief.

I like it, I like it becuase it is cream

What did the man who brutally raped and murdered his infant daughter say? He didn't.

A muslim walks into a bomb store. He is a police officer and quickly arrests the owners of the store because of the obvious legal violations.

A dog got into a gingerbread house. She ate some and brought some to the basement it got on the couch!

Annld so the penguin said, "This is my most casual outfit!"

How many Frenchmen does it take to surrender? Probably just one.

A black man has a job.

Cows are land manatees.

What was Billy for Halloween? A pirate

drugs.

What did Britney Spears say to the Mexican? Hit me baby Juan more time.

Two blondes walk into a bar. You'd have thought one of them would have seen it.

Quantum Mechanics is so difficult to understand, somewhere Stephen Hawking just walked into a bar.

How can you tell if a man has an erection? His penis is no longer flaccid

Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to get well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that while Mary was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas. The tank was full and Mary only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrible car accident. The gas tank immediately emptied and set fire to Mary and her baby.

Q: What do a dollar bill and a kite have in common A: I dont know

How tall is oprah.. 5'7

What do you call a swimming pool full of black people? A family enjoying their holiday.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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