Why is a bulldog so aggressive Because it was raised for dog fights in basements Dog fights aren't right kids, and you should never get involved but if you find yourself in the cage fighting one of the dogs, you should really think about how you got there.

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Why did the teacher arrive late for class? Because his father had a stroke the night before, and they had to rush to the hospital and because of exhaustion, he missed the bus, and arrived ten minutes late.

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Last night, I awoke to the unsettling sound of an alarm. My initial thought was fire. However, after analyzing the situation, I realized that it was only my alarm clock. I turned off the alarm clock, and got out of bed. Then my brother walked in my room and hit me in the face with a toaster.

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Why did the black man not get to go to the party that was filled with all white people? His mother had recently died and so he had proceeded to go to his mother's funeral instead of heading to his white bestfriend's party.

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A black man walks into a sporting goods store and pulls out a gun! Then he returns it and leaves.

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What's the difference between a baby and a textbook? You throw a textbook at the wall with TWO hands.

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What did the fat man say when he was offered infinite french fries for life? Yes.

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What's worse than stubbing your toe? Nothing. Stubbing your toe hurts like hell.

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Your mums so stupid. She bought an apple for 35p even though the shop across the road sells them for 34p

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What's worse than finding out you have cancer? Not much, that would not be so great.

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If i have a remote that can switch people to mute, the number 1 people will be asian, and it will be on the train.

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If i wanted your 2 cents i'd rob you

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? It doesn't matter, the only chuck that matters is Chuck Norris.

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A man is in the desert and he finds a lamp, he rubs the lamp and out comes a genie! The genie says "I can grant your three wishes, for releasing me from the lamp" The man says "I wish I didn't have AIDS".

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Why did I miss my bus? Because my watch was wrong.

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an american an asian and a jihadist got on a train where did they go no where as the jihadist was strapped to c4

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What's worse than losing your wallet? Having a miscarriage.

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Why did the fish but the house Because it wanted to eat the house

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A duck walks passed a lemonade stand.

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how many babies dose it take to paint a fence it depends on how hard you throw them

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why was the witch in the broom factory? she was recently employed there and is loving her job maing brooms

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Why are tests such a pain in the ass? Because your vomiting shit you'd learned the night before.

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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A White guy, Asian guy, and Black guy walk into a bar, and the Black guy wins the joke, as to not be racist.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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