What is the best way to run a race? Start out fast, run fast in the middle, and finish fast.

how many birds did chuck norris kill with one stone? one.

Where did Susie go when the bomb went of? Everywhere?

knok knok whos there know one cares your gay

Why did the kid fail? He procrastinated.

Why can't Helen Keller have sex? She is dead

so your paddling up stream in a cement canoe, one wheel falls off. how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? 46 cause bears dont like eggs.

Whats worse than pulling down a girls pants and seeing a giant furry bush... finding out her vagina has teeth in it.

What do cows in Africa say? Moo

Johnny tried talking to his dog, there was no response.

A little boy running with scissors he trips and falls and dies

Why did the bus driver lose his family in a car accident? Bc the little boy was seeking revenge

How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

Whats slippery and wet? A wet slipper.

What did the Dementia sufferer get for Christmas?

What happenes if you put an elephant in the fridge? Nothing, it wouldnt fit.

Yo momma so fat she when god said let there be let he said get the fuck out the way!

Row, row, row your... Canoe.

Why can't the T-rex clap? Because it's extinct

What did the man in need of a prosthetic arm get from the hospital? A diagnosis for cancer.

You know you are really drunk if your blood alcohol Is higher than .08

Yesterday I was diagnosed with Depression... It made me sad.

What color do you get when you mix blue and red? Purple.

How do you get a dog and a baby mixed up? You stir your chili.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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