What is worst then falling off a tree....... Falling off a bigger tree

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Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the bird.

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How did the man get arested? For doing something leagle.

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Why did I deleted brian from my friend list ? Cuz he had brain tumor.

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A dyslexic man's favourite clothing shop is Tampon.

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Whats black and white and says moo? A Dalmatian retriever with a voice box.

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Kindness is like peeing in your pants, Everyone can see the results, but only You can feel the warmth

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If chuck noris has five dollars and you have five dollars, he has more money than you. He forgot about the extra dollar in his back pocket

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why didn't santa deliver any presents this christmas? Because he isn't real

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what is the ??? crust^2 + Cool Whip

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A elderly man was driving down the freeway when he got a call from his wife. He answered the phone and his wife said "Be careful dear, I just heard on the news that someone is driving the wrong way on the freeway." The wife then heard a loud crash over the phone as the drunk driver going the wrong way slammed head on into her husbands car, killing them both intstantly.

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Why was the man eaten by a tiger? Because tigers are carnivores, but why are they carnivores? Because they eat meat.

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A man walks into a bar.....he then slips on an ice-cube and suffers massive trauma due to the fall. The owner is sued by the mans family and subsequently loses his business. He can no longer provide for his family. His wife is two weeks away from giving birth to their third child.

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Roses are red violets are blue... Only not really. Actually light is reflected off them and these colors show up soo....

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Why did the duck cross the road? Because it was going to the destination he wanted to go to.

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What's the color of a healthy kidney. I have no f***ing idea.

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How did the guy feel after his wife died? Pretty shitty, I'd imagine..

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On the next line im going to write a joke: George W. Bush

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Do you believe in Santa? Cuz i don't. Kookaburra

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What did the no-arm, no-leg, paraplegic orphan with cancer get for christmas? Pregnant.

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What did Madeline McCann get for Christmas? Nothing she's dead.

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Alpine Ibexes climb nearly 90 degree angles to lick salt deposits off mountain sides. They crave that mineral.

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what's worse than biting into an apple with a worm in it~? lots of things.

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Today, my friend threw a lemon at me very hard and hit me in the testicles. FML

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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