Question: You are in a bed between a hot chick and a gay guy, who do you turn your back to? Answer: False, I am to unattractive to find myself in bed with anybody else.

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Whats the difference between a lemon and an ant? They're both yellow except for the lemon.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

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What do a plum and an elephant have in common? They're both gray, except for the plum

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why did suzy fall off the swing? she has no arms, knock knock who's there? Not suzy!

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Why is ms Wolfe mean? Because she is a poop face

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? A man with no arms and no legs

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porn-hub

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Listen pretty lady, NO WHAT WE HAVE BEEN DOING FOR LIKE SIXTEEN HOURS OR SOMETHING NON STOP STRAIGHT, IS VERBOTEN! Honestly, for me its a bit of a requirement, sure girls can go all like "But you are like friendzoned to me now", but then I... Hmm, you know, not a womanizer,my wife has the right word for it, I am a seducer.... Suddenly I do not like the sound of that, actually Its not a bit of a requirement, it is TOTALLY a requirement. Say, does it bother you when I mention my wife like at randomness?

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What's the difference between a baby and a textbook? You throw a textbook at the wall with TWO hands.

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Q: Whats black white and red all over? A: A dead penguin

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Wanna here a good joke? Sure, but you spelled hear wrong.

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How do you make a black man sad? Kill his entire family.

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What smells like satans pubic hair and dresses like a woman? Vinny Trolia

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Did you here about the guy who got his right leg and right arm cut off? I made him up but he would make one good anti-joke.

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Women's rights

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Why was the cook arrested? Tax evasion.

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Why didn’t the skeleton go to see a scary movie? Because skeletons don't have eyes, and can not watch movies.

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What's worse than getting raped? Getting anal raped twice

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whats 69+2? 71

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What color is the white cup? It's blue because it has two handles.

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What did Jesus say to the giraffe? Good day to you sir.

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field day?

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What did Batman and Robin say when they were going to the Batmobile? To the Batmobile

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops