One game a Packers Player scored a touchdown and jumped into the stands. When everybody was touching him one girl put her hand on the inside of his thigh. He told the girl " If your hand goes a little higher you'll feel my touchdown spike."

What's worse than a duck with one leg? A nuclear explosion

What is the difference between the number 20 and 21 1

What would you do for a Klondike Bar? I would probably spend somewhere under 3 dollars at a store, but only if somebody else drives me. I really don't want to drive, not in this gas shortage. You know what...forget it, Klondike Bars make my teeth hurt due to my sensitive teeth problem. I know I should get that sensitive teeth tooth paste, but I always forget when at the store.

Husband: Take the f out of way. Wife: There's no f in way! Husband: You just swore

I hated hipsters before hating hipsters was mainstream. Does that make it sound like I have a fixed gear bicycle? Because I don't... I promise... What's a fixed gear bicycle, you ask? You mean you don't know???

what did the bug say when it got ran over by a car? NOTHING, bugs can't talk

What is intangible and has every color on the rainbow? A rainbow.

Women's Rights.

The ULTIMATE Street Fighter shotokan safety guide one Turbo masters tournament X Revenge Kombat Super Ultimate Alpha Omega F*** Y** Edition! 1. I case an attack breaks both your legs, use your last remaining strength in order to kick the air with one leg, while keeping the other one straight down, then immediatedly yell MYLEGSARBROKEN! In order to receive medical attention. And please remember: If Hadou can, then you Sure can! 2. DLC ONLY 3 DLC ONLY 4. DLC Only. ...hayball rolls trough... 9001: DLC only

What is worse than a person eating cereal? A black person eating white children.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I have no idea but I don't see why it would want to cross a road in the first place. It is a chicken.

What does a horse and a donkey have in common? They are both very different from trees

Why is Easter better than christmas? Theres a significantly less chance of getting raped by a man in a Santa Claus costume.

A black man walks into a house and is shot because it is not his house and it is 2 in the morning.

Last Christmas I gave you my pie but the very next day you put it in your tummay. Now your dead because I poisoned the pie.

-Knock knock! -Who's there? -Pizza. That'll be 20 bucks. -Here you go. -Thank you.

You know what they say about a man's feet... No i don't.

There is a high speed police pursuit when suddenly the suspect's car skids and crashes into a field. Two cows witness the commotion, when one turns to the other and says "Moo".

How many lemurs does it take to paint a wall It depends on how hard you throw them Why did Jane fall off the swing She has no arms Why did Jack drop his ice cream cone He got hit by a bus Did you know that if you pretend to eat salt you can actualy taste it Do this in public. Why was 6 afraid of 7 Numbers can't think This is the original anti joke A man walked into a bar he is an alcoholic and is distroying his family. Fin a penny pick it up and all the day you will have good luck Until you get hit with a car door. A man is SCUBA diving when he is almost out of air so he takes one breath an holds it to the surface The trip is so long that his lungs explode do to a change in pressure so he died.

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I can't really remember the reason, it was about 5 years ago and a lot of things have happened since.

what do you call a kid with no arms and legs under a bus an ambulance, he's obviously in pain

What did Batman's mother say when it was time for dinner? Nothing, Batman's parents are dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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