What do you call a magic owl? HOODINI only some will get it...

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What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak and will soon have her institutionalized.

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Q. what sucks A. getting robbed loosing your family and then you die by cancer

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Why are you on anti joke? Because your not funny enough to make your own jokes

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How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face!

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A homeless man gets a computer. Later that day he is found dead inside the computer.

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A Black man and a racist walk into a bar. There was a ruckus.

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What did the mute man say to his mother? Seeing as mute men can't talk, we'll never know

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What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

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What's worse than watching 5 homeless men have an orgy? Waking up and having to clean the sheets

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what do you get when you use heroin aids.

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Why are rich people so rich? they're not poor.

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Annld so the penguin said, "This is my most casual outfit!"

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What is square and grey? A grey square.

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What did Britney Spears say to the Mexican? Hit me baby Juan more time.

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Why won't the carny let the black kid on the carnival ride? He doesn't meet the height requirements

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A seal walks into a club...and is taken in custody by animal control due to the club having a no animal policy.

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What is yellow and bright? The sun.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I wouldn't consider Mark a chicken. In fact, given the high speed and volume of cars traversing that particular road in both directions, I'd say it was a ballsy move. In hindsight, though, he probably should have waited for the "walk" symbol to appear for pedestrians, in order to avoid being run over by a bus. Anyway, if Pastor John would like to say a few words before we finally put Mark's body to rest...

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What did the black man say to the white man? Hello

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roses are red violets are blue a pyschorapist just ate me refrigerator

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A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 30 years later he would gamble away his family's life savings and then go onto live a long and unfulfilled life.

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Why wouldn't Michael J. Fox make a good Sniper? Because he has no military experience.

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How many jews does it take to change a light bulb? None, you don't have to be jewish to change a light bulb

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops