What did the mute man say to his mother? Seeing as mute men can't talk, we'll never know

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What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

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Why won't the carny let the black kid on the carnival ride? He doesn't meet the height requirements

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roses are red violets are blue a pyschorapist just ate me refrigerator

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What did the black man say to the white man? Hello

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I wouldn't consider Mark a chicken. In fact, given the high speed and volume of cars traversing that particular road in both directions, I'd say it was a ballsy move. In hindsight, though, he probably should have waited for the "walk" symbol to appear for pedestrians, in order to avoid being run over by a bus. Anyway, if Pastor John would like to say a few words before we finally put Mark's body to rest...

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What is yellow and bright? The sun.

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A seal walks into a club...and is taken in custody by animal control due to the club having a no animal policy.

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What is square and grey? A grey square.

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Why are rich people so rich? they're not poor.

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What did Britney Spears say to the Mexican? Hit me baby Juan more time.

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Annld so the penguin said, "This is my most casual outfit!"

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what do you get when you use heroin aids.

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What's worse than watching 5 homeless men have an orgy? Waking up and having to clean the sheets

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What's is the worst thing america has done? Jersey Shore, We mad those idiots rich.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Why did the baby fall off the swing? Because i hit it with a bat.

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Johnny had 50 candy bars. He ate 45 of them. What does Johnny have now? Diabetes. Johnny has diabetes.

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The WNBA.

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Women

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What did the bird say to the fence? Chirp.

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Why was Jessica sad? She had just recently run over a few newborn puppies with her car.

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Today, my house burned to the ground. FML.

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What's worse than losing $100 at the racetrack? Losing at Russian Roulette

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Why did the girl go to the hospital? She had an asthma attack.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops