A chicken crossed the road and the farmer said, "Where the hell is that chicken going!?"

There is a blonde, Santa and Jesus. Someone throws a million dollars on the ground who picks it up? Me because I shot them

Why did schlomo fall off the swing He lost balance because Muslims threatened to kill him

What did the teapot say to the teacup? Nothing. Teapots and teacups are inanimate objects, therefore, cannot speak.

How do you kill a black man? feed him mayonase

What did the black man say to the asian man? hello.

Fine, just give me the top comment FOREVER, and I wont LIEK completely copy and assimilate your identity on Horsehead network... Forever... Muahahahahahaha!

Why is 5 the best number? Because it's alive!

I ounce had a parrot it talked buy never said im hungry so it died

How did Mario finally defeat Bowser? He took Steriods

What's for dinner tonight? Your mom's vagina.

What is funnier than one dead baby? Two dead Babies

Dad: i hate you. dads son:(kills him self)

What do you call an unfunny comment that demeans a group of people? Bigotry

a man in a black van pulls up to a kids house and offers him icecream the kid points out that since it is summer and black absorbs heat, that the icecream will have melted

How did the deaf girl die? I beeped but she didnt hear me

Harry Potter: Hey voldemort, you wanna go get our noses pierced?? Voldemort: I killed your parents.

I like your hair

A man walks into a bar... "OUCH", he says for no apparent reason. He then buys a beer.

What's worse than finding a snake in your apple? Finding a snake in your apple

What did death say to life? Go die

What drops its lunch every day? Yo mom

mental kid

A man walks into a bar and says, "I'll take a drink."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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