What happened when the man got into the taxi? The driver shot him 17 times in the chest and ran away

thumb_up thumb_down +11

I was walking down the street then my hands were itchy so I stuck em in my pockets Jk, I'm a donkey. We don't have hands

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What happened to the guy that got hit by a bus. He died

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Me

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Cole and his brother josh tag team jaycie until she cries herself to sleep while Sarah watches

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What about all the bullshit comments? The spamming?

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A flea walks into a bar. Nobody notices because it is a very small insect

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Roses are red, Violets are blue, What else is new?

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's the most famous anti-joke? This one.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "A door to door salesman. Are you unsatisfied with the way your dish soap handles your plates? Then I have the product for you!" "I'm not interested in your product, but thank you anyway." "No problem. On an off note, how did you hear me? I didn't speak very loudly when I said knock knock, and I didn't even bother to knock on the door or ring the doorbell." "I have really good hearing." "Oh, okay. And for future reference, maybe you should open the door when talking to a visitor. Then body language gets established and the conversation flows more nicely that way." "That's some good advice, and I'll take it. Thanks, salesman." "You're welcome. On to the next house."

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Your mother is so nice, I saw her while grocery shopping and we pleasantly chatted. She also remembered my name and invited me to come over sometime and have a snack.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

whats green andthrows forks at you? a blonde painted green in a bush wih a gun and a fly on her eye

thumb_up thumb_down +11

One dog says to the other dog "Nice day, isn't it?" The other dog says "You can talk!?"

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the blond wreak her car? She stayed up a very long time studying for her mid-term exam, And therefore, was not as attentive to the flow of traffic.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why was the little boy cold? Cause he was traped In a fridge

thumb_up thumb_down +11

this is not a drill.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Yo mamma's so fat, that she weighs alot.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's white, wet, and salty? Salt that has come in contact with a liquid in the recent past, seeing as the liquid has not evaporated completely from the combination of sodium and chloride yet.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How many men does it take to wallpaper a room? It depends on how big the room is and, to a lesser extent, how wide the strips of wallpaper are. Also factor in variables such as ambient humidity.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's the difference between a black girl and a white girl? Nipple color

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A man meets the girl of his dreams. Too bad the man will die in 3 days due to terminal cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Yo momma is so fat that she is overweight

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Q. Why did Steve Carell, the 40 year old virgin, fail to get laid? A. Erectile Dysfunctioning.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops