A cat walks into a bar. What's the first thing it says? Absolutely nothing. It was knocked out.

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roses are red violets are blue , but i would't know that because u never bring me flowers, you bastard .

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Why did the little girl fall off of the swing? Because she has no arms. Why did the little child orphan with no arms or legs get for christmas? CANCER and for his birthday A.I.D.S. R.I.P little orphan

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What happens when you give a Jew an iPhone? He says thank you and gives you a hug.

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weston cage

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what do get when you throw a penny in between a jew and a mexican? nothing besides one less penny

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Two muffins are in an oven one of them says "wow it's hot in here" The other muffin says "Ah a talking muffin"

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Why couldnt the car move? It got blown up by a tank.

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What do you call a disease caused by an uncontrolled division of abnormal cells in a part of the body? Cancer.

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What's read, round and gets smaller? A baby combing its hair with a potato pearler

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Whoever just posted that suicide shit is stupid, you can get arrested for that shit. I would delete it.

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Yo momma is so fat, that when I went over to your house and accidentally stepped on a skateboard, yo momma came out and said "get the %$^# off the skateboard!"

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What did the father say to his son? I'm leaving and I'm not actually your father.

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The audience was ready, the stage was set, as soon as the show ended, the actors applauded towards the audience shouting ENCORE! The audience paid and went home, then they suddenly went... HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEY! WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH THIS SCENARIO!? They cared so much about one another, that they wanted to fall in love with each other. Now that is true love that is not love people! Nerometal (Ironically my name is Nero, I bet the Neronism guys name is Dwayne Maskdork or something, seriously...)

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What happens when a black man is alone the KKK appears

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What did the Asian store clerk say to the midget? yay penis

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Why did the plane crash? The Pilot Wash a Loaf of Bread

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Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? No. Well neither did she.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Ask me if im an Airplane. Are your Airplane? Hell yes

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who ate all the food in zimbabwe? Nick bigg.. he later died of cancer and aids

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What's the best thing about twenty three year olds? There's twenty of them

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Up until today I thought eminem was the lead singer for maroon 5

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What would you call the Flintstones if they were black? You would still call them the Flintsones

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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