What starts with ''F" ends in "uck" and usually means excitement? A Firetruck

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Why did the man die in a car crash? Answer: He was not fallowing the traffic laws and therefore risking the life of himself and others. This may have resulted from the possibility that he was under the influence of alcohol, he was under the influence of drugs, he was emotionally unstable from a bread up, he was emotionally unstable from because of an abusive family, he was emotionally unstable from losing his job, he had an abusive childhood, he was emotionally impaired, he was high from lack of oxygen, he wanted to wear a blindfold, he didn't like his car, liked to spin the steering wheel a lot, he thought the gas was the break, or he just didn't like traffic laws.

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Why did the wife leave her husband? Because they were having sexual differences and time restraints. The husband worked nightshifts as a nurse while the woman stayed home and took care of their child. The husband confessed he never wanted a child in the first place, and that having sexual intercourse with her didn't truly satisfy him.

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a black man and a white man walk into a job interview. neither of them get the job due to lack of skill in the field.

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So Helen Keller walked into a bar... and then a chair.... and then a table..

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she lost her balance.

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Question: How did the little girl die Answer: cancer and AIDS

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What do you call a cold chicken? A Raw Chicken.

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Why did the bartender kick out the three jews at midnight? Because the bar closes at 11.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What would you call Kenny Dalgleish if he was black? Depends on the situation. In a formal environment you would call him Mr Dalgleish, in an informal one it would be acceptable to call him Kenny, Kenneth or just Ken.

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There is big difference between helping your Uncle Jack off a horse And helping your uncle jack off a horse

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Roses are red violets are blue this is an anti joke so like this

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How many Jews can you fit into a 1968 Caddy? 1 in the front, 2 in the back, and 200 in the ash tray.

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Why couldn't the Canadian taste the maple syrup? Because someone cut off his tongue. -BLLJ

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Why did the chicken run across the road? It was 9/11

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Q: What the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies A: I don't have a Porsche in my garage

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Are you the only 10 I see? Because I'm blind.

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25

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I came to the bar at 7:00. What time did I leave at? There was no clock at the bar I went to, therefore i cannot determine when I left or when I cmae, so my above opinion is clearly incorrect.

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How do you confuse a blonde? put her in a circular room and tell her to stand in the corner

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Wanna hear a joke? What? Life.

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What do people call the completely paralyzed man with no eyes? David, his name.

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Why was the boy named Bethel? He had horrible parents that wanted him to live a life of social poverty.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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