Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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A man penetrates another man.

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Your dick is short, If we compare it to mine. That was it, Thank you for your time.

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Q: There was a train wreck in the middle of nowhere, every one died, no one saw the train wreck, so how did the story about the wreck get out? A:Many philosophers believe that the universe is a figment of its own imagination. Therefore, if "the universe" decided that it wanted the story to get out, it could have just made it so since it is its own imagination.

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What happens when you run out of butter You ask antonio

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A white guy a black guy and a mexican are all on a trian. The white guy says "We should all through something off the train that we have too much of in this country." The mexican throws a sombraro of the train and says " We have too many of these in this country." The black guy throws a gun off the train and says "We have too many of these in this country." The white guy pushes the mexican off the train and says "We have too many of these in this country.

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Kris- "Hey! Ask me if I'm a tree! Kait&Alyssa- ".....Are you a tree?...." Kris- "No.(:"

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Did you hear about the 2 pretzels walking down the street? It's not true, pretzels are not capable of autonomous movement.

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What's big, brown, and full of crap? A septic tank.

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I wumbo, you wumbo, he she me,.WUMBO!

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Sally went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. She was exhausted and died of dehydration at the top.

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LeBron in the fourth quarter

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why didn't the bully beat up the nerds? His mom got arrested for molestation and his dad got sent to Afganistan so he was too depressed to beat them up.

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Whats the difference between a sandwhich and a dead baby? People eat sandwhiches.

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Why did the boy not get picked up from soccer? His mom was in a fatal car accident. His dad simply forgot.

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I saw a bull go into a public toilet and defacitate! Bullshit!!!!!! hahahahahahahaha!

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A three-legged prostitute, a coal miner, and R. Kelly walk into an all-midget rendition of Stravinsky's Rite of Spring. The miner has a heart attack and dies. The concubine and the vocalist do nothing to help.

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why did the young teenage boy E J A C U L A T E? because he saw his sexy dad shirtless.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What kind of toy do you give to a dead baby? A death rattle.

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a man was walking and saw a snake he was not afraid of snakes so he kept walking

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yo mumma is so smelly i can distictly smell her more than her perfume

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Ron Paul for President!

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What do you get when you cross a taco with a a bungee cord? An inedible taco.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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