1st person: What is the difference between a jew and a pizza? 2nd person: I don't know 1st person: A Jew is a follower of the zionist faith and a pizza is a popular food invented in Italy and comes with your choice of several delicious toppings. 2nd person: But not all Jews follow zionism 1st person: Well some places restrict your choice of toppings. Whats your point?

Roses are blue Violets are green I have issues, What should I do?

Knock Knock. Who's there? Scott Scott who? Scott Henderson. Oh my god Scotty! I haven't seen you since highschool, please come in.

What do you call a black man? Black

What happen to the girl that received chocolate on Valentine's day? She had a allergic reaction.

Why did the man hit the little boy? His brakes failed.

What's Red and Invisible? No Tomatos

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple Getting raped by a hose

Come on, I am trying to cheer you up a bit, honestly how high?

A man meets the girl of his dreams. Too bad the man will die in 3 days due to terminal cancer

A horse, an apple, a leprechaun and a black man walk into a bar. They sit down and order drinks. The bartender looks at them and say "what is this, a joke?"

A man walked into his house to find that his wife was cheating on him with another man. He was furious, and killed himself

I'm winning at Scrabble.

Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because it thought that it would somehow increase its chances of survival.

roses are red, violets are blue, apparently you are blind or else I wouldn't be telling this to you.

How to you scare a paraplegic? Point a gun at him.

What's the difference between a jew and a jew? They both died in the gas chamber.

Roses are red, I'm tired... I think I'll lie down now

What did the Protoss player say when he lost to a Terran player? I concede defeat. You simply have a greater mastery over the game than I.

Whats worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bees stings? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bee stings. Now, if you have been well-educated you should be able to tell the problem with this joke. Unless you know someone whos jewish and lived during the holocaust, you couldn't be sure if three bee stings was actually worse than the holocaust. If ou do however, thats good for you, keep it to yourself.

Why couldn't little Timmy turn in his homework? Because on the way to school little Timmy was hit by a bus

What's sad about a dead person? He was my friend.

roses are red violets are blue i'm allergic to pollen achoo

Why did Doris need a hip replacement Because she fell down the stairs

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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