What is Helen Keller's favorite color? Velcro

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What does a horse and a donkey have in common? They are both very different from trees

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What is worse than a person eating cereal? A black person eating white children.

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as this could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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Mike and Richard were walking down the street together Richard left because of Mike's garlic breath

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What color do you get when you mix blue and red? Purple.

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How do you please a black person? Shower him with love and affection.

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Ill never forget the last phone conversation i had with my Jewish friend before he died due to the 9/11 incident. Friend:owejpq3jhp3qjopiqwejhriopjhaiophfioashiohwih13ioh3f2893hoiqehefioahfioahisdpahdfajdfopasjiopdfajdfopsajradalkdjakldja;hdfkl;adhlpa;dhfakl;dhkladhkadhlkhdjklahdjkgsdjkgbdqwgy3bi3grqbhgjkasjkdkasjdgjkadgskajgdkajdsgjkasgdad

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Q: What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A: One is a person, one is a food.

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What's worse than 9/11? a dipped glass of milk

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How do you stuff a giraffe into a refrigerator? You can't, giraffes are too big.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it was hit by a car

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69

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Do you know what's sad about 4 black men driving off a cliff in a convertible? They were my friends.

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What do you call a gay Chinese math teacher? A gay Chinese math teacher.

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Why didn't the blind girl go to the party? She wasn't invited!

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What worse that punching a baby? Stabing one.

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A farmer was robbed and complained to the sheriff's department that he suspected it was a black man behind the crime. "How do you know this for sure?" The sheriff asked him. He replied, "I chased him into the night, it was dark and I couldn't see him"

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a black man and his girlfriend are in a car, who is driving? the cop

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What do Kim Kardashian, Paris Hilton, and Pamela Anderson all have in common? All of their last names end with an "n"

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An Admiral walks into Ackbar...

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what do you call a kid with no arms and legs under a bus an ambulance, he's obviously in pain

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Q) What did the Hobo get for Xmas? A) Nothing

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A man buys a kitten from the store. He gets home, takes it out of its cage, and realizes that it wasn't the kitten he wanted. He then returns to the store and exchanges for the kitten he originally wanted, but then decides to keep both because he is feeling particularly hungry.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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