Knock! Knock! "It's open!"

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What did the apple say to the banana. Nothing fruits cant talk.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms... Why couldn't sally get up? She had no legs Why did no one help sally? Because she has no friends.

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Why cant jonny walk? He has no legs.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a convicted rapist.

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What do you call 10 Asians playing basketball? A group of friends hanging out and having a good time.

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What do you call a seagull that flew into the bay? Wet.

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What do you call a black man in space? An astronaut.

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Q: How do you confuse more than 80% of the population? A: Mushrooms.

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what is black and white and read all over? a bankrupt newspaper that cannot afford color ink because the accountant misplaced company funds.

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Why was the young women crying Because her fiancé who was battling a severe Case of pneumonia just passed away

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3 Chinese brothers (chu, bu, and fu) come to America and want to change there names. Chu becomes Chuck, Bu becomes Buck, and Fu becomes Tom because obscenities do not make acceptable names.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A drum set.

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You know why the economy is so bad? Years of giving into corporations instead of local business. This moves the profits to the owner of the company instead of mom and pop who will be giving it back to the local community.

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Why was sally mopping the floor? Because she was a slave

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Why did the girl have twins she was raped

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ive got it ive got ive got outsimers to tonight wow bim bim bub bub za za

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Why didn't the man get to see his family on Christmas? He was blind.

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what happened to the baseball player who couldnt throw? he was very unsuccessful, as throwing is the most important skill of the game

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What do you call an art history major with a job? A gainfully employed member of society, who assuredly benefited from his access to higher education (and quite possibly from acquaintances or family members within the company that employs him, though it is often considered impolite to mention this latter fact, as it may be construed to denigrate the aforementioned individual or his chosen field of study).

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Roses are blue Violets are too I've got Alzheimer Roses are red

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How many kids does it take to get a day off of school? ...26

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What do you call a group that has a microphone, a bass, two guitars and a drum kit? A Band

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, come at me again and I'll punch you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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