Q: how do you make a clean naz dance? A: put a lil boogy in it? NOOO SUCK IT!!!

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Johnny had 50 candy bars. He ate 45 of them. What does Johnny have now? Diabetes. Johnny has diabetes.

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A: Knock, knock. A: Knock, knock! A: Um ... Knock, knock! B: Sorry, I didn't want to answer the door.

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What did the boy get for his birthday? Older.

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knock knock whose there the hospital staff your mom just died of AIDS

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What is the difference between a black man and a sofa? A black man is a human being with feelings, while a sofa is an inanimate object that people sit on in order to enjoy comfort and possibly watch television.

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Roses are roses Violets are violets Sugar is sugar And you're a person

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A guy walks into a bar, has a drink then leaves.

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Two fish are in a tank. One is driving, the other is operating the gun. Two soldiers are in a tank. They both drown.

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-What did the duck say to Federico Costa nearby the phonebox in a rainy day? -Quack

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4

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What does a black person call black friday? Friday

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Your mom is so fat... That you inherited type one diabetes.

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Why didn't grandma ever return Johnathon's calls? Grandma was brutally murdered 2 years prior. Johnathon had issues believing that she was gone. He went on to live a life of pain and suffering, which would eventually lead to suicide at the age of 24.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have Dementia Pickles

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What's the difference between 10 dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage..

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There was an apartment. At the bottom level lived a white family, The 2nd level, there was a mexican family, and the 3rd level, there was a Black family. Someone blew up the apartment with a bomb, WHO SURVIVED? The white family, because the parent were at work and the kids were at school.

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Seargent: Quick seal off all the exits so he cant get away. Private: OK 2 minutes later Private: He escaped sir Seargent: What, how Private: through one of the entrances

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Once apon a time, a man read a book. As he started the book, he said ''once apon a time, a man read a book. As he started the book, he said ''once apon a time, a man read a book. As he started the book, he said ''once apon a time, a man read a book ... it goes on forever. Epilogue: the man and son eventually died because a microphone swallowed a frog. THE END P.S.: I didn't close the quotations. P.S.#2: I don't know what ''P.S. stands for. P.S.#3: I didn't close the quotation again.

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Q: What do you call a Polish astronomer? A: Copernicus.

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Knock Knock who's there docter docter who??? YOU JUST SAID IT DUMBO!!!!!! lolololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololol

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Relax, I said some pretty vile things to you when I thought you where a guy seducing me while it became ever more apparent that you where pretending to be me, thing is I often use this site to vent my frustrations and earning the "praise" in the form of red thumbs by the people. I wont say your name, but I know who you are now, the girl with the big red scared eyes, I mean how many one handed 27 year old`s do I know? I am in my early thirties, that`s all I am willing to share for now, If people come around trying to poke out my remaining eye, I am ready (my waifu, is at her mother`s place, she knows I am still a wanted target by, well some people here and there.

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Why is motorboating so much fun? Because they are unmatched for their speed and agility in the water.

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Two Drunks walk out of a bar. They look down an alley and see a dog licking his balls. The first drunk says" Man, I wish I could do that." The second guy replies " Well you better pet him first."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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