A man shouts a women crossing the road "Oi, get your rat out love!" So she did, and it savaged his face.

How do you get 100 Jews in a car? It is physically impossible to fit 100 full grown homosapians into a vehicle, therefore it will not work.

A have a black guy in my family tree. He married my cousin a few years back

Knock knock Who's there? The Gestapo, time to go to Auschwitz.

What would you do for a Klondike Bar? I would probably spend somewhere under 3 dollars at a store, but only if somebody else drives me. I really don't want to drive, not in this gas shortage. You know what...forget it, Klondike Bars make my teeth hurt due to my sensitive teeth problem. I know I should get that sensitive teeth tooth paste, but I always forget when at the store.

If Hellen Keller could meet Obama, what would she say? Nothing.

nipple

A priest and rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender was incredibly biased towards religion and had the rabbi removed.

why was 6 afraid of 7 because 6 just found out 7 had genital herpes.

an atheist and a christian meet in a bar they chat about football, order some pints, and have a really good night.

Knock Knock Who's There Not you... What? *Pulls out finger gun* *Screams BOOM!*

What did the soldier say when he got shot in the face? Nothing, he died.

you walk into a bar Griffin: 'are you ok'

LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL O LO LO L OL O LO L OL O LO LO L OL OL O LO LO L OL OL OL O LO L OL OL O L OL OLLOLOLLOL OL O LO LO L OL OL O

How do you drown a blonde? Well there are a few ways, including holding her head underwater until she passes out and then leaving her in the pool.

What's the only thing more horrible than trash can full of dead babies? A live one at the bottom. What's more horrible than that? He has to eat his way out. What's more horrible than that? He goes back for more. What's more horrible than that? This all took place in my garage while I was watching.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Cancer

What do you call a black person driving a plane? A pilot, because you dont want to call him anything racist i mean he is driving you up 25,000 ft in the air and the last thing you want is for him to get mad and decide to do something rational, God, you racists.

What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs because disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion).

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread!

Today I wanted to make world peace.... So I killed everyone.

Why was the Energizer Bunny arrested? He was found guilty of two acts of murder in the first degree.

My dad died on Mothers Day, my mother was happy. Actually Iied, we were all sad.

Have you ever tripped over a leaf? No. Neither have I.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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