Q:What the difference between a piano and a guitar A: Nothing, there both instruments and i lied about the difference

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Roses are red, violets are blue. I know.

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Why did Madona rub shit on her vagina? Because she was horny.

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What's something that really sucks? Having a homicidal cat on your chest.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didnt, it got stuck at a red light, it waited 5 minutes before getting frustrated and leaving. Later that day the chicken realized that it had forgotten to press the button.

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A man walks into a bar, then he leaves and goes home

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what's worse than finding a worm in your apple. finding an apple in your pet worm.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilots had brain damage.

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Why did the man cross the road He didn't, he died after being hit by a car

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What does a eagle and a bunny have in common.. nothing they're two different animals.

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One girl said to her friends, "LOL guys wait for me." She ran to a pile of corpses. The girl was about to lose her sanity as she was in denial when her friends had died. She held hands of two of the corpses and smiled and pretended everything was ok.

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Why was little Jessica missing?? She was stuck in the freezer.

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Knock knock Who's there? April April who? April fools

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hi anti joke

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Why did Joe not cross the road? Because the Pedestrian Crossing light said not to.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? 24

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A man is on an operating table. His heart stops beating and he suddenly finds himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter approaches him. "Welcome, my son," St. Peter says. "I will ask you one question, and that will determine whether you can enter Heaven." The man nods nervously. St. Peter asks, "Did you ever commit a sin and never sought forgiveness?" The man thinks long and hard. "No, I always made sure to apologize." St. Peter smiles. "Congratulations, my son. You have passed the test, and may enter Heaven!" The man is ecstatic as the pearly gates open up for him. He enters Heaven and is astounded by its magnificent beauty. The man then loses all brain function and dies on the operating table.

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GONNA

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Why did the car stop To buy drugs

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Whats a difference between an eagle and a tree? They both can fly. Oh yeah, I Iied about the tree.

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A sloth walked into the dentists he was confused

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What happens when you mix a camel and a penguin? A cenguin!

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how many babies does it take to fill up a blender? None. they all died before being put in a blender.

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A fish swims up your penis...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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