Which came first, the chicken or the egg? The Big Bang. -BG_Shank_A

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 took sexual advantage of 9.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends. How hard can you throw?

If you are stranded on a deserted island would you eat your hand or the 5 star meal you butter prepared? -Matt

A Pakistani news reader.

Knock Knock . . . I'm coming in!

Why was Frankenstein green? Because he painted himself green. Frankenstein is the scientist, not the monster.

A drunk man is that last one inside a very popular bar. He passed out on the counter before he ordered a drink. The bartender is angry at a sale lost, which would have been his millionth sale before closing time on the 1000th day of business. He goes home and hangs himself.

What do you call a deer with no eyes? extremely unfortunate...

How do you make a car? You build it.

Your mama's so nice, she made me cookies once. And I enjoyed them.

What makes you hate life and feel good at the same time? A rapist.

Why DIDN'T the chicken cross the road? Because 7, 8, 9

What did T Pain say to the skipper of his yacht? I'm on a yacht

What do a grape and an elephant have in common? They're both purple, except for the elephant.

what is the diference between my left tit and my right tit .... my right one was cut off because of breast cancer

Why did captain hook die? He wiped asss

i walk into a bar,and then proceed to be taken out because i am a minor -chuckles

Why were people laughing when Muhammad Ali signed autographs for his fans? He was making jokes regarding his Parkinson's syndrome in order to elevate an otherwise melancholy experience for the audience.

Whats worse than getting raped by a monkey The fact that you actually got raped by a monkey

What did the ocean say to the shore? Nothing, water and sand are incapable of speech. Unless of course you are Harry Potter in which case you can cast a spell on them and turn them into a cat which still couldn't talk and them from there you could wait for them to evolve which doesn't actually exist so you would have to ask God and then you would wait for a few years than they could say hi.

rose's are red violets are blue bernard is mine and yours too if you hurt him in any way i'll punch you in your face and make you gay Krissc

A grasshopper hops into a bar. The bartender looks down at him and says "Hey, we have a drink named after you." the grasshopper looks up at the bartender...then proceeds to hop along because Grasshoppers can't communicate with humans. Then several of the bars patrons looked at the bartender, worried for his mental health.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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