25

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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What did the elderly lady say to the man? You still have not repaid my services

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why did the Japanese boy drop his ice cream ? Because he was hit by a building.

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If this joke were a potato I would be very confused

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Why couldn't the pirate get into the movie? Because he was armed and clearly inebriated.

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Your family is so fat that when their feet hit the ground, it recorded 9 on the richter scale, because they were launched at the Earth at close to the speed of light, and when you account for relativistic mass effects, the amount of energy that was displaced into the ground was tremendous

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What do you call the worst band ever? Nickelback.

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fuck you you punkass piece of shit I hope you burn in my uncle's titties and ass rape yourself while screaming "make it stop!'. Then, I hope that you take a titanic needle and shove it up your lower kidney until it tears open and all your bodily fluids spill out into an ocean of shit. Also, I have 73 balls with a ballsack for each ball. So, I have 73 ballsacks.

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A christian and an atheist are in a bar. The christian says "if you don't accept Jesus Christ as your lord and savior you will go to hell." The atheist replies "No I won't."

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why did 9/11 poop on a condominium? fuk

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Why a polar bear fell over? He drank so much

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i like men but im not gay

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Yo Momma's so old... She has lived a great life and you should be very proud of her even though she is slowly dying of a degenerative disease.

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What's the opposite of Christopher Walkins? Christopher Reeves.

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Yo mammals so stupid, she's got AIDS!

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24... wait i thought of something better than 24... let me hear it... 25!!!!

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goats are like mushrooms, if you shoot a duck, im scared of toasters

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I like trains (:

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Why did the road cross the chicken? REVENGE

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Steve: Ask me if I'm a tree. John: Are you a tree? Steve: No.

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you were so loud you woke helen keller up!!!!!!!

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why were the girls confused? they were in a logic class and couldn't seem to find the irrationality chapter in the book

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A guy walks into a bar. But it was a solid steel bar and suffered severe wounds and a concussion. Lucky for him a bystander saw this happen and called 911. The man was transported to a hospital where he eventually made a full recovery and returned to work after one year.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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