Why do canadians have a lower violent crime rate than the U.S? Because they were all raped as children and are now afraid of getting raped again when bathing in prision.

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heads up!

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What's the sexiest thing on a farm? It depends on what you find sexy, and your personal perception of a farm.

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Why was the mushroom invited to the party? Because the party was a rave and some mushrooms are know to make the consumer of them hallucinate wildly.

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why did the monkey cross the road? it escaped from a local zoo a block away

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What's the square root of 69 Jimmy? Square root of 69 is 8 something right? Cus I've been trying to work it out oh. Jimmy! It's 8.306623863 >.

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WEED!

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Yo momma's so fat, she's broke 'cause she spent too much money on food.

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You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't eat your friends Nose it is!

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These jokes don't have punchlines.

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A horse walks into a bar, it broke both its legs and was then put down.

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Roses are grey Violets are gray Imma dog

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whoever said we're all soft on the inside was probably not an experienced doctor.

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What's worse than a stain on your carpet? Two stains on your carpet

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What's a pirates favorite element the periodic table? Gold.

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A man adopts an orphan. He waits till the child is a teenager to tell the news. He then commits suicide as to scar the child emotionally for the rest of its life.

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what is the diffrence between a chinesse man and a japanesse man, one is ruled by a cruel communist leader.

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Q. What did the pedophile get when he went to jail? A. Exactly what he wanted.

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What's the best part of a family reunion? The sodomy.

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Two Chav's jump off a cliff who wins? Neither, the affects of gravity are equal despite the weight of said object.

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A blind man walks into a bar, and a table, and a chair.

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-Knock, Knock -Who's there? -Carl -Carl wh-wait... carl...CARL OH MY GOD!!!! WE ALL THOUGHT YOU WERE DEAD ,CARL!!!! Where have you been? Oh my god... Mom's DEAD! When we all thought you were dead she hung herself! IT'S YOUR FAULT SHE'S DEAD, CARL! YOUR FAULT!!!!!! YOU ARE AN UNGRATEFUL PIECE OF SHIT CARL! YOU KNOW THAT? I hope you burn in hell.

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Why can't George Washington sit up straight? He's dead.

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What's worse than getting bit by a spider? getting bit by two spiders What's worse than getting bit by two spiders? getting raped What's worse than getting raped? a butterfly landing on you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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