why did the monkey cross the road? it escaped from a local zoo a block away

Q: What's black and white and rape kids? A: Pandas, I lied about the rape.

Help iv fallen and i can get up -blarg

A man walks into a bar Ouch He broke his penis So he ate it Then he saw a little boy They shaved their pubic hair together He raped the little boy He walked into another bar Double ouch

why did the boy fall off his bicycle? because his dad threw a refrigerator at him.

One day, a small bald man was walking up the street, when her saw a large red porche, extremely grand, and the door was wide open. He walked over and inspected the open door, and to his surprise, the keys were in place by the steering wheel. He was a good man, with a loving wife and two teenage children, and he had no intention of steeling the vehicle. But astonished by the owner lack of protection, he hopped into the car and drove it around the block, just for the thrill of riding such an amazing car. Around 30 seconds after, he parked the car, got out, leaving the car in the same place, with the door open and the keys in, then he walked home and lived the rest of his life.

Q: What's red, pink and spins round and round? A: A baby in a blender Q2: What's red, pink, green, and smells bad? A2: The same baby 2 weeks later

Mr.Green walks into the class. He is alone with no wife and no kids and suffers from depression. His salary is below average and he can't pay the rent this week so he'll probably get evicted. He has aids. He will die in 2 weeks.

What's funnier than 24? My life.

Why did the man walk into the grocery store? To provide an alibi for his identical twin who was committing 1st degree murder at the time.

Q: If you are running a race and a fridge hits you, how many dogs play x-box in the snow? A: 12 orange waffles

How old is george washington? anyway thats not the point your pregnant

How do you make a frog stand still? Shoot it.

What happened when the zombie walked into the blonde lady convention? He went home hungry.

Why did the chick cross the road? To get to the brothel for hot lesbian love.

How do you stop your baby crawling in circles? Pick it up and smother it.

Why was Harry arrested? Because he stabbed multiple children.

what did the boy with no arms get for christmas? A pair of robtic arms and now he has super stregth so he fuk up any body who said he would get cancer.

What did the penis say to the vagina during intercourse? It didnt say anything, the male said to the female "i like pickles."

What did the boy say when he got hit by a car? Nothing, he punctured his lungs.

why did the little boy die? He had AIDS

what's worse that reading something that just wasted seconds of your life? reading this and wasting more seconds.

Why can't we see the wind? Because no one likes you...

Q: What's the answer to this question? A: The question to this answer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...