Roses are red. Violets are blue. I like pie. I know you do too.

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There were three men standing outside. They were enjoying the nice weather.

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Why did captain hook die? He wiped asss

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yo momma so fat... she went on a calorie controlled diet and lost 3 stone, she's a really nice lady too.

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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A blonde walks into an electrics shop and asks to buy a television set. The shop-owner explains that she is signalling a microwave and is concerned for her mental wellbeing.

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What Is big, round, and looks like gaben. Gaben!

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What's black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

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whats polish and black a polish black person

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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What's black and hanging on a tree in my backyard? Blackberries.

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Q. What did the dog say to the cat? A. Ruff.

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One girl said to her friends, "LOL guys wait for me." She ran to a pile of corpses. The girl was about to lose her sanity as she was in denial when her friends had died. She held hands of two of the corpses and smiled and pretended everything was ok.

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: Depends how hard you throw them.

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Spoiling your fun. Jesus said on the cross, I shall return. Then he returned three days later to say goodbye to his people. Moral: What the fuck are you Åsshats waiting for? The third coming?

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What is red and sits in the corner? A naughty strawberry.

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Who invented the Iceberg Salad? The Titanic

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Knock knock Come in

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What KFC? Deep fried aborted babies.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black.

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What do you call a black kid on a bike? Dirt bike

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you need 2 pple for this. Ask me if im a tree? Are you a tree? no

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What did the horse with herpes say to Paul? Ney

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everybody loves raymond

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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