Q: How do you get a giraffe into a refrigerator? A: You open the door put the giraffe in and the close the door. Q: How do you get an elephant into a refrigerator? A: You open the door to the refrigerator take the giraffe out then put the elephant in and close the door. Q: The Lion King is hosting an animal conference, all the animals attend but one, which one is it? A: The elephant it's in the fridge Q: You have to cross a river that is inhabited by crocodiles how do you cross it? A: You swim across, the crocodiles are at the animal conference.

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yo mamma is so stupid she failed high school

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Whats more annoying than listening to another arrow in the knee joke? bink2w32.dll is missing from your computer.

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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What happened to the man who had the most loving parents and family when he was born, had an amazing childhood which he shared with so many good friends, was loved everywhere, helped the poor, started a fundraiser for starving kids in africa, got a college education, helped a complete stranger get off his drug addiction, married a beautiful woman, bought a nice house and had 3 children who he loved dearly and spent time with as much as he possibly could, tucked them in every night and enjoyed every second of his life as if it was his last? He died.

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What's the difference between a pizza and a jew. One's a tasty delicious snack and the other one's a pizza.

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the mountains? A: Bear food.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? It's hard to say, as this number depends on a large number of factors including the average area covered by one lick, the pH of saliva, the solubility of Tootsie Pops, the temperature of both the saliva and the Tootsie Pop, and the amount of saliva deposited on the Tootsie Pop after each lick. This is not to mention all the manufacturing irregularities that may occur during production, and varying tongue shapes and solvency properties of saliva.

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Nobody likes you ya noob! (-_-) *sniff* MAN YOU SMELL BAD

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Knock-Knock Whos there? You're about to get shell shocked...

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Yo mama is so stuPid that she blew a man for bus money then walked home

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I bit a horses leg. Why? Because I thought i was a vampire. I also bit my sisters glodfish in half.. Why? Cause I wanted revenge on my sister.

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There were 50 koreans; half of them liked gangnam style but the other half didn't. Why didn't the other half like gangnam style? They were north koreans.

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Two people are walking down the street, unaware of the highly polluted environment and that they could save a life.

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What do you call Mary in a wheelchair ... virgin mobile

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So, today I was walking down the street... I met a black guy.

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you mooma's like a bowling bowl i pick her up finger her throw her down the gutter and she still comes back for more

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Q: What is sad about 4 people in a Cadillac driving over a cliff? A: You could have fit more.

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A French man gets into a fight

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

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A: I slept in your mums bed last night. B: don't care dad

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Who is happpier than the grouch about the Zombie Apoclypse? Dora.

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What do you do to vegetables to make them taste good? Nothing. They are still people, and they can't speak up for themselves.

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What do you get when you cross a spoon and a fork? A spoon crossed with a fork.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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