What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A drum set.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

A Chinese man, a Mexican man and an African man walk into an American bar. None of them know any English and can not order a drink. They walk out promptly, frustrated by the difficulties of living in a strange new world where they don't speak the native language.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

A blind man, a black man and a rabbi walk into a bar. The blind man trips violently.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What do you call a midget on the moon? A midget.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why didn't the Hispanic die in the bus explosion? Because he was at home playing with his children when it happened.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

how do you get a 1 armed moron out of a tree? you wave

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What did the man in need of a prosthetic arm get from the hospital? A diagnosis for cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Q: whats worse than being in the car for 1hour A: being in the car for 2 hours Made by: grant chapman:)

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why was sally mopping the floor? Because she was a slave

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Your mama's so fat, that at her last annual checkup her attending physician informed her that it would be in her best interest to diet and exercise before her obesity manifested itself in a variety of chronic afflictions that would detract from her ability to lead a long life.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What do you call a group that has a microphone, a bass, two guitars and a drum kit? A Band

thumb_up thumb_down +29

what do you call a blond who likes human flesh a cannibal

thumb_up thumb_down +29

How many Druggies does it take to make toast. One.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Whats black and white and red all over. A penguin in a blender.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What does a horse and a donkey have in common? They are both very different from trees

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What's the difference between a zit and a priest? These two things are so different that I couldn't list all of the differences in this text box.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Q: What do you get if you combine a melody, instrumentation, rhythm, and vocals? A: Um, music, you idiot.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

This is supposed to be an anti-joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What's the difference between a chair and an identical chair? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

An American, a French man, and Jew were all in an airplane about to skydive. Their skydiving instructor comes out and says, "I'm sorry, there seems to've been a mistake and we only have two parachutes." The company refunds them, and they, while reasonably disappointed, agree to reschedule the lesson.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You were adopted and I couldn't think of a good way to tell you...

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Roses are black, Violets are black, I am blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

If you give a mouse a cookie... ...you're destroying its natural diet. It might die.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

How do you make a blond to shoot herself? You give her a gun and than ask her to pull the trigger.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops