A cat walks by a chineese buffet, the owner kindly puts food and water outside the door so it doesnt die

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Why does Santa live in the north pole? Because his spicy body fat keeps him warm.

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What's worse than having cancer? Two people having cancer

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Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number. He looks it up first to make sure he's got it right before dialing.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

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Yo momma so fat that they've diagnosed her with type 2 diabetes and she has an extremely elevated risk of heart disease. You should really encourage her to try and eat better and get more exercise.

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Why did the carrot jumped over the fence? It didn't. Carrots do not have the physical ability to jump.

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A child logs on to antijoke.com he is a chronic masturbator

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What's worse than getting bit by a spider? getting bit by two spiders What's worse than getting bit by two spiders? getting raped What's worse than getting raped? a butterfly landing on you

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You're at a funeral & your phone goes off and the ringtone is dead and gone

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adam sucks off disabled old men for a pac of biscuits

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What's a pirates favorite element the periodic table? Gold.

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whats the difference between a pizza and a jew? Pizza is not human, Jewish people are.

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What's the best part of a family reunion? The sodomy.

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Why did the little pig squeal? Because he was going through blades at a slaughter house.

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Three Kids dressed as a bear, a chicken, and a penguin walk into a bar. The bartender asks the to leave as they are all under the legal drinking age.

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Why couldn't the fireman get over the hill? Because he was dead.

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How do you kill a blonde? Drench her in fluoroantimonic acid and watch her explode in a violent and gruesome death.

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Why is paper white? Cause that's how they make paper.

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What's sad about 4 people in a Lamborgini going over a cliff? It was my car.

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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You Wanna hear an anti joke? Womens rights

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why was 6 afraid of 7? because he's a pussy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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