What's the difference between Michael Phelps and Adolf Hitler? Michael Phelps can finish a race.

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what's yellow and hovers? a yellow hovercraft.

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Why did the white boy not make his high school basketball team? Because he was not as good as the other players.

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What's green and has wheels? A refrigerator, I lied about the green and the wheels.

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You shouldn't have expectations. They make ex out of pect and tations.

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Not lying Red, I have my contacts, I am a "facilitator", I pull strings for my employers, and sure the FBI has me on their files, after all we have cooperated with them. Not because I wanted to, but because its my job, and it helps me use the best of my abilities and limited education (I am technically an educated lawyer, and not an agent).

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What did the black guy do with his gun? Shoot a deer

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monster under your bed? thank god im in your closet...........

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A lion walks in to a bar, and murders everyone inside. This is why animals are not aloud in bars.

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Why do all black people look the same? They don't, you're either just racist or unobservant.

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What do you get when you cross a train track and a bumpy feild, Further along on your GPS map.

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Q: What happened to the monkey when he jumped off the tree. A: He died Q: Why did the second monkey jump off of the tree A: He was attatched to the first monkey Q: Why did the third monkey jump off the tree A: Peer Pressure

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So, theoretically, if we controlled the media, what would be different then?

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If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.

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top kek

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What is brown and sounds like a pickle? Poop

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Yo mama so fat she has more chins than the Chinese phone book. A.V.T was here Fred.

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What do you get when you cross a black man and a mule. Arrested.

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What happens when a llama falls off a cliff? It dies.

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So this moose walks into the super-market and asks the lady woman at he counter "Got any potatoes?" Lady woman says "Down Isle 5" So the moose goes down isle 5 and there isn't any potatoes

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whats worse than getting killed by a random tomahawk in COD mostly anything because COD is only a video game

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what do you call two mexicans playing basketball? juan on juan

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try this on someone: Knock Knock Who's there? Knock Knock Who's There? Knock Knock They will keep asking who's there while you laugh

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how do you get a rat out the house you lift it up and put it outside

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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